Ask the Gods
by Ayaashi
Summary: Welcome to... ASK THE GODS! As previewed on the UK, Percy Jackson site. Ask the gods questions in the reviews, and they will answer them! Maybe if the Titans are in a good mood they'll answer your questions too...
1. Chapter 1

**Summary: Welcome to... ASK THE GODS! As previewed on percyjackson . co . Uk. Ask the gods questions in the reviews, and they will answer them! Maybe if the Titans are in a good mood they'll answer your questions too...**

**Disclaimer: I do not own Percy Jackson... or this first chapter as this is used from Rick Riordan's site as a start to the story – but I've slightly editted some of them.**

**Note: Bold is either a comment from me or a letter.**

**Dear Posiedon,**

**I read in my History book that you are very self-centered. Is that true?**

**Historyrulz =)**

Dear Anonymous,

Who wrote that book? One of Zeus' lackeys, no doubt. That's a bunch of rubbish. Just because I am hugely powerful, incredibly good looking, devillishly intelligent and an AWESOME surfer does not mean I am self-centered. I hope I've set the record straight for you.

**Posiedon,**

**How did you decide to invent horses?**

**Horseluvr**

Dear Horseluvr,

Ah, well there was this beautiful girl I wanted to impress, you see. We were walking on the beach. I snapped my fingers, and the white foam on the waves turned into the manes of the first horses, which galloped onto the beach. Not bad, eh? Beats a boquet of roses every time.

**Hey Posiedon, how did Sally and you meet?**

**PosiedonxSally4evz**

Dear PosiedonxSally4evz (Don't let Amphtrite see that name!)

Ah, Sally. I was strolling down the beach on Montauk one evening when I saw this beautiful woman. She looked straight at me and said, "You're carrying a trident." I was disguised by the Mist as a regular surfer, but she saw right through that. We struck up a conversation. One thing led to another, and we fell in love. Aphrodite looked like she was going to cry with joy. Women.

**Dear Lord Posiedon,**

**How do you control water?**

**waterizmylife**

Dear waterizmylife,

Pretty much any way I want to! It's what I do, okay? It's like me asking you how you breathe. It just comes naturally.

**Hey Poseidon**

**How do you feel about having a cyclops as a son?**

**One eyed,**

Dear One eyed,

They're strong, they're loyal, they do what they're told and make great weapons. What's not to like?

**Ares, will you marry me baby?**

**Aresequalshot**

Take a number, babe.

**Dear Ms. Athena , Mighty Goddess of Wisdom, what is your fatal flaw?**

**Curiousismymiddlename**

My dear,

Heroes have mortal flaws. Gods do not. Fatal is something that gets you killed, after all, and we gods cannot die! True, I've been accused of being too proud, but that's ridiculous. Just because I turn my rivals into various forms of creepy crawly life forms - I'm doing what any god would do!

**Dear Athena, You are so cool! I was wondering if there was anyway to become smarter than everyone else in 5th grade? Please help!**

**Needstobecomesmarter!**

Dear Needstobecomesmarter,  
>Why, yes indeed. You must read a great deal. You must explore what you love to do. And you must never settle for the easy solution. That is a guaranteed way to become smarter than your peers, but it is not quick or magic, I'm afraid. You mortals have to do things the hard way.<p>

**Will the Wise Goddess Athena overthrow Zeus and become the ruler of Olympus?**

**AthenaforrulerofOlympus**

Dear AthenaforrulerofOlympus,  
>What an interesting idea . . . No, just kidding, Dad. Put away the lightning bolt. My dears, Athena is much more subtle than that. Who says I'm not already controlling Mount Olympus from behind the throne, eh?<p>

**Hey Hermes, **

**How do I come up with good come-backs when someone insults me (for fun)?**

**comebackideas**

I've got to go in like... 10 minutes, so I'll answer this one, as I have a reputation for being quick. What I like to do is think ahead and try to anticipate what insults people will use on me, then I can plan for the perfect comeback. If that doesn't work, I usually disintegrate them into a pile of ashes. Hope that helps! Ciao!

**Dear Lord Hermes,**

**Are you embarrassed by the Fashion brand named after you?**

**anonymous**  
>What can I tell you? People are so amazed by me, it was only a matter of time before they named a fashion brand after yours truly. Embarrassed? Nah, I think it's charming. You mortals are so cute.<p>

**Dear Mr D/ Dionysus,**

**How do you deal with a hangover? Help!**

**- Gonnabedrunk**

I'll let you know when I get to have wine again in a HUNDRED BLASTED YEARS! Sorry, I'm a little touchy on that point, but my father Zeus has grounded me to Camp Half-Blood in his infinite wisdom. If I recall, a lot of water helps before and after partaking in wine. A cheeseburger is also a surefire way of avoiding unpleasant headaches the next morning.

**Yo Hades, what's it like having zombie bodyguards? Betcha don't have much problems with door-to-door salesmen!**

**zombiesrock **

Dear zombiesrock (and I can't agree with you more),

In fact, no. I have no problems at all. Unfortunately, my zombies also make it very hard to get the mail, as the postal carriers tend to run away. It could be Demeter that scares them too... mother-in-laws'

**Dear Zeus,**

**Why****dont****lightning****bolts****appear****straight?**  
>- <strong>zigzagzigzag<strong>

Well, my mortal friend, lightning is a very tricky source of energy. It zig-zags around quite a bit, which is why it takes a very smart powerful god like me to control it.

**Zeus, **

**What type of migraine did you have to give birth to a goddess. I would like to know in case I have one and then I'll be aware that I'm pregnant.**

**Paranoidfreak**

Dear Paranoidfreak,  
>Yes, that headache was a whopper. I mean, I even agreed to let Hephaestus get out his axe and split my noggin open. Can you imagine? For you mortals: DO NOT TRY THIS AT HOME! If any of your relatives say, "Oh, headache, dear? Let me get the axe." I would run away very fast. Try Tylenol instead.<p>

**Zeus, **

**No offence or anything but since Athena came out of your head didn't she exhaust your supply of brains. If yes, where did you get more?**

**scaredofZeus**

Dear scaredofZeus (and you should be)  
>The next sound you hear will be the lightning bolt blasting through your roof. Indeed, puny mortal! I have infinite brains. Athena was merely taking up room in there!<p>

**Dear Aphrodite...**

**Why do Ares and you go out if you're married to Hephaestus?**

**somethingsmellsfishy**

Oh dear. Ask me this again when you're eighteen. It's quite complicated.

**SO THAT WAS IT! =)**

**Now it's your turn to ask the Gods. Choose any God or Titan and put the question in the review. What do you want to know?**

**- Soulless Bloody Angel**


	2. Chapter 2

**Summary: Welcome to... ASK THE GODS! As previewed on percyjackson . co . Uk. Ask the gods questions in the reviews, and they will answer them! Maybe if the Titans are in a good mood they'll answer your questions too...**

**Disclaimer: I do not own Percy Jackson... or any of the questions as they are from my AWESOME reviewers. =)**

**Note: Bold is either a comment from me or a letter.**

* * *

><p><strong>Dear Artemis,<strong>

**Are you insulted that the greatest criminal mastermind was named after you? I am speaking of Artemis Fowl, child genius. :3**

**- Artyfowlfan**

Dear Artyfowlfan,

As insulted as I am at the fact that a _boy _was named after me, in some ways I may find it... sweet. You mortals are adorable for the ways you praise us Gods without knowing it. I feel quite honoured to be thought of as a genius, because if he is named Artemis then he is like his namesake; a genius.

I hope that answers your question.

Artemis

P.S. If you are a boy, tell me, so I can turn you into a jackalope - you'll love it. Fresh air, and girls hunting you then killing you. A brilliant lifestyle for boys.

**Dear Hephaestus,**

**If all the gods can change their appearances, why can't you make your self look handsomer?**

**- Weirdness-is-cool**

Dear Weirdness-is-cool,

I think I should be insulted by that... but really, I find that hilarious. I suppose the reason I keep myself this way is... well actually there are two reasons:

a) I can slowly make Hera feel guilty. I mean it's _her _fault I look like this. She's my mother and my genes come from her and Zeus so I can make them feel guilty. Good reason, eh? It makes them feel guilty almost all the time. Well, '_them' _means Zeus... and it's '_almost' _all the time. Meh.

b) I am who I am. Deal with it people.

I still find your question hilarious though... come down to my forges at any time! You might be better company then most living forms.

- Hephaestus

**Dear Apollo,**

**Which of your children is your favorite and why? (You better not say you love them all the same, Apollo)**

**- Weirdness-is-cool**

Dear Weirdness-is-cool,

I am so awesome

I shouldn't have to answer

That question is hard

- Apollo

P.S. That was the quickest haiku I ever made. It's awesome like me, right? =) SMILEY FACE! =) ATTACK OF THE SMILEY FACES =)

P.P.S. I am hot =) Just had to state the obvious.

P.P.P.S. That does not mean that Castellan was hot! He had a stupid scar! I'm WAY better than him! Oh shoot! Hermes is looking to kill me now! BYE!

**Dear Aphrodite,**

**I first wanted to say about how you are by far my favorite goddess. And I would also like some advice. At my school, there are these two people who obviously like each other, but aren't going out. How do we get them to admit their feelings?**

**Thanks!**

**-SwimmerChick**

Dear SwimmerChick,

Aw, you're so sweet dear... where are my boys? They need to fall in love with you.

About the advice; Trick them. Or get me or one of my daughters to charmspeak them. I prefer to trick them though as it's SO much cuter... think of a way to admit their feelings to each other without realizing it and then when they realize what they've said they can't take it back. I'll ask Athena about some other ways...

Or you could talk to them separately. Try and convince them to admit their feelings.

I hope this helped dear! Tell me if it didn't and I'll think of more ways!

Love Aphrodite

**Dear Hades,**

**You seem like you hate the Underworld A LOT, so who do you think got the best job out of all the Gods?**

**- xxxx can't stop me now xxxxx**

xxxx can't stop me now xxxxx (By the way, that's a REALLY long name...),

I would like to see YOU try and run the Underworld for over three millennia after your two ANNOYING, YOUNGER brothers FORCED you to take over the Underworld.

It is annoying as hell (pun unintended), especially when SO MANY PEOPLE DIE!

Excuse my ranting.

So who got the best job?

I would say Zeus. He got to take over the sky and become King of the Gods... while he left me to be King of the Underworld... not cool. Some people say the Underworld is better than Olympus and I may agree... MAY.

- Hades

P.S. Please don't die. There are too many dead people in the Underworld. But don't come down to the Underworld if you're alive either. It's annoying.

**Dear Ares,**

**Have you ever felt the urge to blow up something that's big and/or important? And if so, what was it?**

**-Queen Of The Turtles**

Punk, (a.k.a. Queen Of The Turtles),

Duh. Of course I have. I blew up the Twin Towers - I got grounded for like... FOREVER for that... it's not my fault you mortals are so breakable. In China I once blew up this building... it was awesome. Oh and the bomb attacks in Mumbai? They were me too. As you can see blowing up stuff is my hobby. It. Rules.

Ares

P.S. If you know that brat Perseus Jackson tell him that I'm going to destroy him one day. Stupid punk...

**Dear Kronos **

**Why can't you get ovr losing to the gods? I mean look at all the empty planets! You could take them give them life and the Titans could build a multi-planet empire, then you could just crush Olympus by numbers. Oh ****and how are you doing?**

**Best regards, and hope you get out of Tartarus soon**

**Pyy**

Foolish mortal named Pyy,

If you're sons and daughters chucked you into a recycle bin, would you not want to destroy them? I will never rest until I have destroyed them and Olympus... unless I am in pieces or scattered like dust. And interesting idea... hm... excuse me. Oh and I'm not fine.

I hope I get out of Tartarus soon too

- Kronos (SOON TO BE RULER OF THE WORLD)

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><p><strong>I hope you guys liked the answers!<strong>

**Thank you for the reviews and questions guys! I really appreciate it! Without you guys I wouldn't be able to carry on with the story!**

**I'm glad you liked the idea, and I'll update every chapter as soon as I've got at least 6 or 7 questions as that amount will be a decent length for a chapter.**

**- Soulless Bloody Angel**


	3. Chapter 3

**Summary: Welcome to... ASK THE GODS! As previewed on percyjackson . co . Uk. Ask the gods questions in the reviews, and they will answer them! Maybe if the Titans are in a good mood they'll answer your questions too...**

**Disclaimer: I do not own Percy Jackson... or any of the questions as they are from my AWESOME reviewers. =)**

**Note: Bold is either a comment from me or a letter.**

**Note 2: Please check the AN at the bottom.**

* * *

><p><strong>Dear Demeter,<strong>

**Don't you ever get sick of cereal?**

**- Bell**

Dear Belle,

Cereal is amazing! Why would ANYONE get sick of it? It's so tasty... so yummy... so healthy... you know, because you asked that _ridiculous _question I will not give you any cereal and give everyone else MUCH more! I'm so disappointed in you... the only person I've ever had to do that to was Hades... and he's just a mean, old, stupid, annoying, useless son-in-law/brother.

Oh! I have to go feed Peresphone more cereal!

Goodbye sweetie! And be nicer next time! Or else...

Love Demeter

**Dear Olympian Gods (Yes, this goes out to all of you),**

**How did you react when you discovered fanfiction?**

**- Embrace-Your-Insanity**

Dear Embrace-Your-Insanity,

We (This is currently Zeus replying) decided we'd summarize what all of us think.

The Olympians all agree that - by mortal standards - the stories are excellent - well most of them are... apart from a few. The flamers can go... jump in Tartarus as they have no right to bring people down like that [There's Posiedon and Hades muttering about how much of a hypocrite I am - idiots]. If you have nothing nice to say, don't say anything at all. About certain... pairings? Like... what does Aphrodite call them... yes, Percabeth and Thalico... Aphrodite calls them cute. The rest of us couldn't care less - but if Thalia and Di Angelo get together, I'll murder anyone supporting them. Or whoever started it. You have been warned.

Have a pleasant day - depending where you live and who you are

Zeus

**Dear Atlas,**

**Why didn't you get one of the other Titans to hold the sky for you? You are the Titan General. And also, how did you feel about being defeated by Percy Jackson and his friends (including your daughter, Zoe)?**

- **Melissa**

****To the insufferable brat who asked me those two questions,

I hate you almost as much as I hate Jackson now - and that's saying a lot. I am not writing this, I have a monster to write this for me (Yes, we Titans will come back into power soon) and to answer your first question... none of them would take it. I couldn't force them into it, therefore I was stuck with it. And the second question... I'm not answering that.

I will send you to Tartarus - as soon as I get free of this stupid punishment

Atlas

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><p><strong>Hey guys... when I was typing this... I lost all my work. And I stared at it, thinking: What. The. **.<strong>

**With everything that's been going on lately... I almost lost it. FML. Meh...**

**Now... a small complaint... I don't want to, but it's necessary. Guys, if I only get three reviews - and thank you to WithFriendshipComesBetrayal (love the pen name by the way =) ), Embrace-Your-Insanity (Love this pen name too =) ) and Melissa for reviewing, otherwise I couldn't have done this chapter - in every chapter, I won't be able to do this story. See how short it is right now? If I got more questions and reviews, I could make it longer, therefore making you guys happier. I checked my hits and saw 18 people read the previous chapter. If even a HALF of you had reviewed this and asked a question, I could have made this longer. So please... review?**

**- Soulless Bloody Angel**


	4. Chapter 4

**Summary: Welcome to... ASK THE GODS! As previewed on percyjackson . co . Uk. Ask the gods questions in the reviews, and they will answer them! Maybe if the Titans are in a good mood they'll answer your questions too...**

**Disclaimer: I do not own Percy Jackson... or any of the questions as they are from my AWESOME reviewers. =)**

**Note: Bold is either a comment from me or a letter.**

* * *

><p><strong>Dear Apollo,<strong>

**No offence, but what's up with the random haikus?**

**-Jaya**

Sup Jaya!

No offence taken!

So anyway, the random haikus are too improve my skillz - which I don't need to improve but I do it anyway! And to entertain my listeners! I mean, they're awesome, right?

Shut up Artemis. Sorry, she was being an utter bi -

FU - dgesticks. Sorry Arty! AH! SHE'S SHOOTING MY BURNING ARROWS AT ME! _MY _BURNING ARROWS!

HEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEELP!

Hi there Jaya, this is Artemis. Apollo is currently unavailable to finish this message so I'll sign off for him.

- Apollo

**Dear Aphrodite,**

**I have two questions for you, one: What do you REALLY think about JasonxPiper? Two: I have a HUGE crush on this boy in my class at school, but, I've barely admitted it to anyone. How can I get through to him without blurting everything out?**

**-Jaya**

P.S: Can you ask Ares why he is the god of war? I'm afraid he'll blow me up...

Dear Jaya,

To answer your first question, I love it! Well... not as much as Percabeth... or Thalico (don't tell Zeus that!) but... well actually... I don't really like it right now. But once Jason meets Reyna again... with Piper... then I think I'll like it a _whole _lot more - if you know what I mean ;)

To answer your second question, start with dropping small hints. Give him a bit more smiles then usual, talk to him a bit more, be friendly and comfortable around him. Don't seem desperate - that's the most important thing. Or if he has any feelings for you, he'll immediately lose them. Then a few days later, give slightly bigger hints - but only if he responds to you and talks to you in a friendly way. If you two have gotten closer, ask him about himself, and work your way towards asking about the love part of his life. If he's uncomfortable, it should be fairly obvious. Drop it for a while then, and maybe a week later try it again.

If he's rude and mean to you though, forget about him. He's not worth your heart.

And I'll ask Ares later when... well, I'll ask him later.

Tell me how it goes!

Love Aphrodite 3

**Dear Hermes,**

**Where did you get the idea to make the Internet?**

**- RandomMind075**

Dear RandomMind075,

Where did I get the idea to make the Internet? Well... you see, I thought that it was a bit hard for you mortals to communicate... and I thought of a program, based on our own Olympian Internet - yes, that's where the name came from - without the special features of holographic images - but I'll probably add them in a while - and other things. So... that's where your Internet came from. From my ingenious thinking. And partially George and Martha's convincing skills.

- Hermes

**Dear Ares,**

**From all the war that had happened, which is your favourite?**

- **RandomMind075**

RandomMind075,

You just asked me an extremely hard question... probably World War II... because it was the bloodiest so far. Or the Trojan War... that was fun to fight in. So... World War II... BLOOD FTW!

- Ares

**Dear Aphrodite,**

**You see, my best friend is falling in love with her ex-boyfriend's younger brother but she's afraid of being hurt. But, she claims that he is sweet to her and is her 'dream boy' whereas he says he likes her. Should I motivate my friend or is this the wrong choice?**

**-Miss A**

Well my dear Miss A,

I think that you should motivate your friend BUT you must remember that if anything - and I mean ANYTHING - gets out of hand, immediately confront your friend. You do not want her getting hurt, and you don't want any problems. So it depends on the situation. If everything's going fine, then motivate her! But at the sign of danger, warn her and tell her that she must be careful about getting hurt. And if she doesn't listen to you... then keep pushing her. You will have to be firm. She may get mad at you, but to be a true friend, you have to help her, even if she may not like it at the time. In the end, she will understand. And if not... blame it on me.

I hope that helps dear!

Love Aphrodite 3

**Dear Hera,**

**Personally, me and Maggie think your an awesome goddess! In fact, why do people think you are such a cruel person? We find that you are doing a great job especially with your 'job'.**

**-Kathy & Maggie**

Dear Kathy and Maggie,

Why thank you, and I'm glad you think so. To tell you the truth, I think it's because of my little spat with Heracles, but really, if your husband cheated on you, wouldn't you have the right to be angry? And if he cheated on you MILLIONS OF TIMES, wouldn't you have the right to be EXTREMELY angry? Thank you my dears, and I hope you have happy married lives when you get married.

- Hera

**Dear Persephone,**

**How is it like living in the Underworld? Do you enjoy being in the Underworld more or when you aren't?**

**-WouldLikeToKnow**

Dear WouldLikeToKnow,

It's not actually that bad. Mother keeps ranting, but really, it's fine. Yes it's dark, but Hades let me have my own garden! And hand-maidens! Even though they're a bit creepy... and I think I like both. Both have their ups and downs... so I like both.

- Persephone

**Dear Demeter,**

**How do you feel about the word 'cereal killer'?**

**-XxCerealRulesxX**

Dear XxCerealRulesxX (I love your name by the way! I need to see you sometime!),

I despise that word... =.= If I find the person who has invented it... I swear, I will turn them into a crop of wheat and turn them into cereal!

- Demeter

**Dear Apollo,**

**Why don't you go get yourself an IMMORTAL wife rather than flirting with so many mortal women?**

**- Bell**

Dear Bell (Yes, I'm fine now =) Artemis can't hurt me that bad),

You see, when getting an immortal life, you get dragged down and are stuck with her nagging. It's annoying. Really. Annoying. Ask any married god ;)

And also, it's funner - I don't care if that isn't a word! - and more amusing to see them blush and to twist them around... he he =)

PEACE OUT!

Apollo

**Dear Kronos,**

**Is it true the dark side has cookies?**

**- Bell**

Bell,

No it is not. I do not have cookies... though I think Oceanus does... so in a way we have cookies. =.= We must destroy the cookies.

There! Done! No more cookies! So... we have no cookies.

- Kronos

P.S. Beware mortals. I will be back soon.

**Dear Lady Aphrodite,**

**Thanks for the compliment! And I tried to trick them into admitting their feelings, and they gave me a detention. But, it is for love so its worth it :). I probably should have mentioned that they are two teachers. But, they would be like the ultimate couple! Do you happen to have any other ideas or suggestions because I would love to hear them!**

**Thanks!**

**-SwimmerChick**

Dear SwimmerChick,

No problem sweetie =) And that's definitely true! ...they are? ... ...okay... makes things slightly harder but I will NOT give up! I need some time to think... hm... I'll get back to you ASAP.

Love Aphrodite 3

**Dear Poseidon and Athena,**

**What do you feel about the fanfictions with pairings of Poseidon and Athena?**

**- Yessy**

To Yessy,

...I hate them. The authors better be careful...

- Posiedon

Dear Yessy,

I despise the fanfictions with pairings. They. Are. Not. True. Anyone says otherwise, and they should beware of the wrath of Athena.

- Athena

**Dear Zeus.**

**You rock. Whats it like being one of the most powerful Gods ever?**

- **Yessy**

Dear Yessy,

Why thank you. And I'm not ONE of the most powerful Gods, I AM the most powerful gods. Anyone says otherwise, then tell me. They won't be on Earth or Olympus for much longer. More like in the Underworld.

It's brilliant being the most powerful... you get so much power. And you can boss people around. Bonus.

- Zeus

**Dear Artemis,**

**How did you end up hating men and boys so much?**

**- Yessy**

Dear Yessy,

Well, you see, I suppose that Apollo's the reason... I mean, he's always flirting with women, and it's so rude! And then there's the whole thing about Orion... and the way women are treated by men! Outrageous! That's why I hate them. I could go on a rant but... I have to go hunt.

- Artemis

**Dear Athena,**

**You are very awesome. So anyway, how is it like being the godess of Battle Strategy and Wisdom? And what is the funniest moment you have ever had?**

**- Yessy**

Dear Yessy,

Thank you very much for the compliment. And it's a very interesting job... but the problem is, people complain about my plans and ideas, because they don't think things through, properly. It can get extremely annoying... and the funniest moment would probably be when I bet Posiedon easily as he was stupid enough to not plan at all while fighting the Goddess of Wisdom - it was a battle of words and it was in front of the other gods. You can imagine how much he was teased...

- Athena

**Dear Poseidon and Athena,**

**As you guys know, your kids are DATING. And I was just wondering, what do you guys think about it? Cause personally, I love it. Percabeth is awesome.**

**-curligurl0896**

Dear curligurl0896,

I don't really mind that Percy and Annabeth are going out. I mean, it's Percy's choice and if he's happy, it's fine. But if Annabeth does anything to him... =.= She better watch out. And if her mother tries to interfere... =.= We will have World War III and I don't care about the mortals. No one, and I mean NO ONE, ruins my son's happiness.

- Posiedon

Dear curligurl0896,

At first, I despised it. I mean, my beautiful daughter and POSIEDON'S son? But... I suppose... he may be alright... maybe. But if he hurts Annabeth... =.= Beware.

- Athena

**Dear Hera,**

**Why don't you cheat?**

**- suggaboiz**

Dear suggaboiz,

I do not cheat because if I did, I would be called a hypocrite. And SOMEONE has to set an example to all the people who cheat on others...

- Hera

**Dear Athena,**

**I think you should turn Medusa back. She was clearly sorry for what she did and what not.**

- **suggaboize**

Dear suggaboiz,

I WILL NEVER TURN THAT SCUMBAG BACK TO NORMAL! SHE WAS DISRESPECTFUL! HER AND HER STUPID SISTERS! SHE DESERVES TO BE IN THE CONDITION SHE IS! IF ANYONE ELSE SUGGESTS THAT I WILL TURN YOU INTO A JACKALOPE AND LET ARTEMIS HUNT YOU DOWN!

...I am sorry about yelling but no. I will NEVER turn her back. And she added another thing to the list of reasons why I hate her; she almost killed Annabeth when she was only 12.

- Athena

**Dear Posiedon,**

**WHY U NOT MY DAD!**

- **suggaboiz**

Dear suggaboiz,

Ahaha =) I'm glad you think so highly of me. Well... I just am not. Sorry. XD

- Posiedon =)

**Dear Kronos,**

**I am currently traveling the world, collecting you dust in a glass jar, should I blow the jar up or give it to Atlas? Kidding! Real question: Why, if you're like the "Big Bad Guy" aren't you supposed to teach us bad stuff? My parents always tell me never to quit and you NEVER quit.**

- **Soozin Hevincarrr**

Soozin Hevincarrr,

I don't like your first question =.= And for your real question... well, first, Big Bad Guy? ...I dislike that name. =.= So, aren't I supposed to teach you bad stuff? ...could you expand on that? Like, how to take over the world? No chance. I will not give away my secrets. And I know I never quit. I am extremely persistent. I WILL NOT QUIT UNTIL I DESTROY THE GODS!

- Kronos (Soon to be King of the Universe)

**Dear Leto,**

**Are you offended that you, mother of the most awesome gods in the universe, was not included in the Percy Jackson series. Love ya!**

- **Soozin Hevincarr**

Dear Soozin Hevincarr,

I don't mind much... I'm just glad my children are mentioned. I expect _Hera _didn't allow me to wake up in that time, and didn't let the author mention me much. Stuck up little... =.=

- Leto

**Dear Apollo**

**How did you get so awesome and hot? Are all of your children really good at music, because your the god of it and stuff (right?)?**

**- Soozin Hevincarrr**

Dear Soozin Hevincarrr,

It takes extreme skillz to be as awesome and hot as me =) In time, perhaps if I bless you, you may be as awesome and hot as me. Yes, all my children are really good at music and singing, because I'm the god of music _and healing and prophecy and the sun and literature and awesomeness._ (HA! I HAVE MORE TITLES THEN ARTEMIS! =))

The awesomely hot

Apollo

**Dear Rheia (sorry if I spelt it wrong),  
><strong>  
><strong>Why were you never mentioned as a participant in the second Titan war? Where are you hiding? What's it like having Zeus as a kid, it must be painful?<strong>

**- Soozin Hevincarrr**

Dear Soozin Hevvincarrr (Can I just call you Soozin?),

Firstly, my name is Rhea and it's alright. Greek names are always hard to spell.

In answer to your first/second question, no I was not hiding, and I wasn't participating in the Second Titan War. You see, all the eldest gods - Hestia, Hades, Demeter, Hera, Posiedon and Zeus - are my children and... well, after 3 millennia of thinking, I've realized that, perhaps, in a way, they are right. Us Titans have had our reign, and now it is our children/grandchildren's turn. Kronos obviously doesn't understand this, so I decided that instead of reasoning with him - he never listens anyway, I mean, he ate 5 of my kids! - I decided to not participate. I didn't expect us to win anyway.

To have Zeus as a kid... well, he is my child, so I do love him, but I must say, he could be frightfully annoying. And when his siblings came back he was awfully cocky... what did those nymphs teach him? No manners at all... I wish I'd been able to teach him some.

I hope this answers your questions

- Rhea

**Dear Hermes - the most awesome thief,**

**What do you think about being paired up with Artemis, Apollo and Hades? (Sorry about the last two; my classmates have very weird minds, and my family is all in for the first one). Also, do you ever get a break? And what is the best prank that you can think of?**

**- goddessofhunt**

****Dear goddessofhunt (Don't let Artemis see that! She'll be so annoyed),

...I do not like being paired up with Artemis as a) She's a MAIDEN, b) She doesn't understand pranks and c) She's my HALF-SISTER!

I hate being paired up with Apollo as a) He's my HALF-BROTHER/BROTHER, b) WE'RE BOTH MALES and c) NEITHER OF US IS GAY - well I think Apollo was... once.

And I ABSOLUTELY HATE being paired up with Hades because a) He's my UNCLE, b) He's god of the effin' DEAD and c) ONCE AGAIN, NEITHER OF US IS GAY!

I hope that clears that up.

Do I ever get a break? During meetings or if Zeus has ordered me to do something else or if there's a war. So pretty much... hardly ever. Rarely. It's a tiring job... working, working and working. =.=

What is the best prank I can think of? I am the GOD OF PRANKS - well not really, but I should be. Hm... I should ask Zeus about that... any way, I can think of the absolute best prank ever! ...but I'm not going to share it ^^. Because a magician/prankster, keeps his/her secrets to himself/herself.

* * *

><p><strong>*screams and tackle hugs everyone that reviewed* I LOVE YOU ALL! I LOVE YOU! I LOVE YOU! I LOVE YOU! I LOVE YOU! I LOVE YOU! I LOVE YOU! I LOVE YOU! I LOVE YOU! I LOVE YOU! I LOVE YOU! I LOVE YOU! I LOVE YOU! etc, etc. XD<strong>

**Thanks so much guys! =) Keep up the great work! =)**

**Bleh... by the time I finished answering questions two hours were over... and I was tired... but happy =) Very, very, very happy =)**

**I was having a really bad day... until I saw the reviews... =)**

**Once again, lots of love to the reviewers!**

**Keep reading and reviewing!**

**And check out my other stories too!**

**- Soulless Bloody Angel**


	5. Chapter 5

**Summary: Welcome to... ASK THE GODS! As previewed on percyjackson . co . Uk. Ask the gods questions in the reviews, and they will answer them! Maybe if the Titans are in a good mood they'll answer your questions too...**

**Disclaimer: I do not own Percy Jackson... or any of the questions as they are from my AWESOME reviewers. =)**

**Note: Bold is either a comment from me or a letter.**

* * *

><p><strong>Dear Hades,<strong>

**Why have you not done anything about your anger management issues? (Seriously, do yoga or something!)**

**- Soozin Hevincarrr**

Dear Soozin Hevincarrr,

I do NOT have anger management issues, I don't care what the other gods have told you. I bet they're trying to turn more and more people against me. =.= I think some 12 gods need talking to's. And I despise yoga. It is BORING. Not as fun as torturing evil souls.

- Hades

**Dear Dionysus,**

**Have you ever had a drink of water?**

**- Soozin Hevincarr**

Dear Soazi Nehvacar

Yes I have. Of course I have! Wine is not the only thing I drink - unfortunately. Now go away you annoying brat! I hate you little brats, always asking stupid questions to me, the Camp Director who wants a PEACEFUL life. Oh damn... Zeus has called me to Olympus... =.= If you're the one who complained, I swear I will kill you.

Have a (NOT) nice day

Dionysus

**Dear Gaia,**

**Hey when you do your "take over the earth" thing, can you like, spare half the earth or something? That'd be nice.**

**- Soozin Hevincarr**

Dear Soozin Hevincarr,

I will think about it... but it depends which side. If you mean the side that Greece, Rome and America are on, no chance. Otherwise... maybe...

I'll probably next see you running around, screaming as the world ends.

Gaia

**Dear Aphroditie (sorry if I spelt your name wrong)**

**I have 2 problems:**

**#1 My best friend keeps on saying I have a crush on this guy I was forced to sit next to. How do I get her to stop, 'cause I don't have a crush on him...?**

**#2 I kinda have a crush on my best friend's crush, but I don't want to hurt her. HELP?**

**Love from**

**BookWormLuvzPJO**

Dear BookWormLuvzPJO,

It's Aphrodite dear, but that's alright =) So... to address your problems...

#1 I find the best thing to do in this situation is to tell her to stop teasing you. If she doesn't stop sometimes the best thing can be to just get mad at her. It may seem harsh, but if they're not stopping, you have to be harsh sometimes. It will also teach her not to mess with you next time ;)

#2 For this problem - this is quite a hard one - I think that you need to decide, which do you want more. Your best friend, or your crush? It all depends on that. If you want your best friend, then it might be best to forget the boy, until your friend is over him, or if she doesn't get over him, just completely forget about him. If you want the boy... then... I think you know what to do. If you can't decide, maybe, cautiously, admit to your friend that you like him too, but you want to keep your friendship. If she gets mad at you, then... I'm afraid you'll have to choose the boy. If she doesn't get mad, then try talk things through. Communication sorts out problems.

Love can be very complicated (That's why you need a smart goddess to be in charge of it XD) and it can lead you to make hard decisions in your life. It all depends on your priorities and what you are willing to give up.

Hope this helped.

Let me know on how you go.

Love Aphrodite =)

**Dear Hades,**

**I just want you to know your my favourite god.**

**I also want to know if you have control over devils 'cause I love them.**

**Your #1 fan**

**BookWormLuvzPJO**

Dear BookWormLuvzPJO,

Why thank you. It's nice to know _someone _appreciates me.

And actually devils aren't real, I'm sorry to break it to you. Devils... in Greek Mythology, I would be the 'Lead Devil' - which I really don't understand - and then the other devils would probably be the Furies.

Hoped I cleared up confusion

Hades

**Dear Lady Aphrodite,**

**There is a boy my two friends like. He's cute and funny, but also unavailable. He is dating. My two friends don't like the girl he is dating. I treat him as a little brother. People tend to think I like him and he likes me. Between the two of us, I do have a small crush on him, but my BEST FRIENDS don't know that. HELP ME PLEASE!**

**- Ali**

Dear Ali,

Ah... love is so hard isn't it? Well, I suppose this is like one of the questions I answered (See above) and that might help for explaining it to your best friends. And if you want to admit it to him... hm, well the hard part is that he's dating someone... I'll see what I can do to help you, but maybe for now, wait for him to become available.

Do you know how often he changes who he goes out with? That can lead you to some clues on how to deal with this too.

Let me know ASAP and I'll try and help you ASAP.

Love Aphrodite =)

**Dear Kronos,**

**Firstly, your are the best immortal in history**

**So, if there was a way to destroy the gods but it involves you dead, will you take it or not**

**P.S Do not call me mortal**

**P.P.S if you need a leader of your armies, I'm here**

**-Jaccus**

_Mortal,_

Firstly, I will call you what I want to call you.

Secondly, do you really want me to take over your soul?

Thirdly, thank you.

And for the question... no. As it would be completely useless as someone else would take my place.

Lord Kronos (Soon to be King of the World)

**Dear All The Gods**

**Doesn't it get boring..I mean being a god/goddess?**

**-pErCaBeThFaN-**

Dear pErCaBeThFaN,

This is Zeus. The whole council as talked this through... and we all have our answers. Here they are.

Zeus (Me): No. Just... no.

Posiedon: HADES NO!

Hades: Of course not. And Posiedon STOP USING MY NAME IN SLANG!

Athena: You must be insane. OF course not.

Aphrodite: NO! IT'S SO FUN!

Hera: Yes... it gets lonely...

Demeter: ...meh. I wouldn't mind being a mortal. At least I would still get cereal!

Artemis: Don't be ridiculous.

Hestia: I think I would prefer to be mortal... it can get painful seeing so many heroes die...

Ares: NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO! BEING A GOD IS AWESOME!

Hermes: It gets busy... but no.

Apollo: NO! I WOULD HAVE TO LEAVE MY MASERATI! =O D= (He added those in =.=)

Hephaestus: I don't care... at least I'd get to leave Aphrodite... stupid cheater...

Dionysus: ...no. But the brats are annoying.

I think you got your answer; mostly no.

- Zeus

**Dear Atlas,**

**I love you.**

**- xKIEAxCHILDofhermes**

I am disturbed... I don't love you, mortal.

- Atlas

**Dear Hades,**

**Is it true you look like Russell Brand?**

**- xKIEAxCHILDofhermes**

Dear xKIEAxCHILDofhermes,

Do I look like _who_? Who the hell is Russell Brand?

- (a confused) Hades

**Dear Zeus,**

**WHY U SLEEP WITH ME!**

**JK, but, why don't you have more kids with Hera?**

Dear xKIEAxCHILDofhermes,

I DIDN'T SLEEP WITH YOU! HERA I SWEAR I DIDN'T!

=.= You just caused my wife to yell at me... for the trillionth time.

To answer the question... don't tell her this but... she's boring.

- Zeus

P.S. You owe me a new throne. =.= She destroyed it in anger.

**Dear Awesome Apollo,**

**May I humbly ask, what are your favorite music genres? Since you're one of my favorite deities.**

**- SiMpLiCiTy-iS-tHe-bEsT**

Dear SiMpLiCity-iS-tHe-bEst,

I know I'm awesome... THANK YOU FOR ADMITTING THAT! HA! ARTEMIS! I WIN THE BET!

Anyway, I like all music genres... apart from classical - unless I'm sleepy. It's pretty much my job to like them all... =)

And thanks dude/dudette =)

- the Awesome Apollo (I'm gonna make that my new title... thanks! =) )

**Dear Hermes, **

**I really want to know what's your feeling about your title being 'The God of Thieves'? Are you proud of it?**

- **SiMpLiCiTy-iS-tHe-bEsT**

Dear SiMpLiCity-iS-tHe-bEst,

I like the title... but in ways... it kind of feels bad... you know what I mean? It's a great title but... it makes me feel bad that most people think that as my only aspect... I don't only steal stuff... and I'm kind of proud of it. Actually I am. Who wouldn't like stealing things and being a thief?

- Hermes

**Dear Kronos,**

**So, you have this power to control time, do you? How does it feel to control time? I bet it's fun, since I think it's a pretty cool power.**

**P.S : You control time, do you? I just wanna make sure of it.**

**- SiMpLiCiTy-iS-tHe-bEsT**

SiMpLiCiTy-iS-tHe-bEsT,

I can't control time silly mortal... not exactly. Not like Chronos (The Father of Time). He's in charge of time. I can bend time to my will. It's different. And it's amusing. And a bit annoying sometimes... when I accidentally do it.

- Kronos

**Dear Rhea,**

**What's your feeling about being the wife of Kronos, The Lord of The Titans?**

**- SiMpLiCiTy-iS-tHe-bEsT**

Dear SiMpLiCiTy-iS-tHe-bEsT,

It's fine... apart from the fact he ate my children... =.= It's not very fatherly... and he's a bit too obsessed with power and destroying my children and grandchildren... I can never talk him out of it. So actually, forget the first sentence. It's annoying.

- Rhea

**Dear Athena,**

**Firstly, I want to know why you choose owl as your symbol.**

**Second, Who's your favorite mortal figure? How about Alexander The Great, I think he's a very cool general and king.**

**P.S : I'm so sorry for asking you so many questions. Didn't mean to annoy you.**

**- SiMpLiCiTy-iS-tHe-bEsT**

Dear SiMpLiCiTy-iS-tHe-bEsT,

To answer your first question, the owl has always been considered a smart animal, and it really is a smart animal. And it looks wise too.

To answer your second... I have three (By the way, I dislike Alexander the Great... too much brawn, not enough brain). They are: Albert Einstein; Leonardo da Vinci, who took my advice on his greatest inventions; Bill Gates (He was going to call it 'Shutters,' and I said, 'No, Bill. Windows.')

And it's alright, I enjoy answering questions that make me think.

- Athena

**Dear Author (Soulless Bloody Angel)**

**Sorry for asking so many questions. I hope they don't annoy you. I would be really happy if you can answer all of my questions. But, it's okay. You don't need to answer all of them if you don't feel like.**

**Million thanks,**

**- SiMpLiCiTy-iS-tHe-bEsT**

Dear SiMpLiCiTy-iS-tHe-bEsT,

NONONONO! =.= No saying sorry for asking questions. Asking questions is good. =) Very good. And I sound around 5-ish, but that's probably cause I'm pissed at my friends and am trying to relax... so I'll sound myself now. So anyway, I want none of you saying sorry for asking questions. I enjoy it! And I will answer every single question I get, I swear on the River Styx. =.= Zeus is trying to kill me now for offending him - long story. I'll type up the rest while I'm on the run.

Love

Soulless Bloody Angel

**Dear Posiedon**

**Given that you can control water, and body fluids have water in them, does that mean you can heal using saliva?**

**- TrollKastell**

Dear TrollKastell,

Er... I suppose I can... I've never tried it... and I really don't want to try it. I mean really, would you?

- Posiedon

**Dear Kronos,**

**What would you do to a 14-year-old girl who can stop time and beat the heck out of a crazy, city-large witch? And how do you feel about this girl?**

**- TrollKastell**

TrollKastell,

The only person who could stop time apart from me would be my demigod daughter. I will never have a demigod daughter. I already dislike her. I don't care what she can do, if she's my 'daughter' I hate her. Children are annoying.

- Kronos

**Dear Apollo, **

**What's your favourite musical instrument besides your lyre?**

**-Kirino Tsuki**

Dear Kirino Tsuki,

Hm... probably the guitar. Electric guitar. IT'S SO FRICKIN' AWESOME! I MEAN, HAVE YOU HEARD IT BEFORE? IT'S SO DAMN AWESOME! IT'S THE AWESOMEST - apart from my voice of course. =)

- Apollo =)

**Dear Kronos,**

**THE CAKE IS A LIE! **

**-InYourFace**

InYourFace,

WTF? You will die in 7 days.

- Kronos

**Poseidon,**

**Do you like rainbows?**

**-RainbowPonies**

Dear RainbowPonies,

Rainbows are definitely cool. They're made from water. But they're not as cool as the ocean. The. Ocean. Rules. All. The Ocean FTW. =)

- Posiedon

**Dear Ares,**

**What's your favorite weapon, and why?**

**-XxBroadswordsRulexX**

XxBroadswordsRulexX,

Either the gun or the sword.

Gun cause it's so quick at killing people. Sword because you can play with your prey before you kill them.

- Ares

P.S. Your name is pretty cool... you may or not be a punk... _punk._

**Dear Hermes,**

I was wondering, if you knew your name sounds like Herpes.

(U MAD?)

- **xKIEAxCHILDofhermes**

Dear xKIEAxCHILDofhermes,

Your my kid? Oh... well hey kiddo =) So um... I never thought about it... I suppose it does. But I'm not mad. Mortals are weird. They put weird names for diseases.

- Hermes

**Dear Demeter,**

**Why did you plant weed into the earth, and is it your favorite plant? (U MAD?)**

**- xKIEAxCHILDofhermes**

Dear xKIEAxCHILDofhermes,

I didn't plant weed into the Earth. Weed appeared to try and kill my beautiful plants... I hate it. =.= And no it is not my favourite plant because technically, it's not a plant. And yes I'm mad because I hate weed.

- Demeter

**Dear Apollo,**

**I lost my voice. Like, I'm cracking when I sing tenor, and I'm a soprano. Next week is auditions for the school musical and talent show, and the choir concert is in two weeks. I have a SOLO in said choir concert. A little advice, please? Not singing is kind of killing me.**

**You're the coolest god ever!**

**.LIFE**

Dear .LIFE (By the way I totally agree with your pen name =) ),

Firstly, I understand how not singing is killing you. It does the same to me. =O The best thing to do is rest your voice and not drink fizzy drinks or anything like that - stick to water (Awful, I know D=). Also no eating anything that can stick to your throat - chocolate, ice cream, things like that. Torture, yes, but it's better than mucking up during all the performances and stuff.

I agree. I'm the coolest! =)

- Apollo =)

**Dear Athena,**

**Is J.K. Rowling your daughter? Because she's the best author in the UNIVERSE, and I figured she'd be related to you somehow.**

**.Heart**

Dear .Heart,

J.K. Rowling is not my daughter, but she was blessed by me as I saw that she potential. Her life was... well, pretty much rubbish at times like when her mother died, her marriage collapsed, etc, so I decided to help her out a bit, give her some small ideas... but it was pretty much all her work, but just my blessing to protect her, herself.

- Athena

**Dear Posiedon,**

**How did you come up with what horses look like?**

**-Jaya**

Dear Jaya,

You see, the odd thing is, I didn't control that. I just had wanted to impress the girl, and it was like the image was already in my mind. With a flick of my hand, the horses came out of the sea, looking 'beautiful' - horses coming out of waves always beats roses, keep that in mind ;)

- Posiedon

**Dear Apollo,**

**First, thank you for answering my other letter. Second, how come, since you're the sun and snow melts around you, the arctic doesn't melt when you go there?**

**-Jaya**

Dear Jaya,

Firstly, no problem! Secondly, it depends on the heat of the sun. If I put more pressure on the pedal, then the heat is stronger. So while going over the Arctic, I just loosen up the pressure? Am I making sense?

- Apollo =)

**(Previous question: Why is Ares the god of war? - Jaya)**

Punk,

Aphrodite told me your question and my answer is: BECAUSE WAR IS FU - er... I mean FRICKIN' MOST AWESOME THING IN THE UNIVERSE! Do you have a problem with that?

- Ares

**Dear Hephaestus,**

**How do you feel about Aphrodite cheating on you?**

**-Bell**

**P.S. I don't understand why she would, personally, I think you're one of the awesomest gods ever.**

Dear Bell,

In some ways... I don't care. It's her choice. In other ways... I hate it. It's annoying. I'm not that bad. Okay, I'm ugly. But I blame Hera! It's not my fault if my mother is a retarded cow! Oh shut up you old bat! Sorry, not you. That was to Hera. Ah... now she's yelling at me... and by the way, thanks.

- Hephaestus

**Dear Poseidon,**

**WHO LIVES IN A PINEAPPLE UNDER THE SEA?**

**SPONGEBOB SQUAREPANTS!**

**Anyway, the question is, is there a pineapple under the sea? If so, does Spongebob live in it?**

**- Bell**

Dear Bell,

Of course there is a pineapple under the sea with Spongebob living in it! Note the sarcasm.

There is no stupid sponge living in a pineapple in MY SEA. I would never allow it. It's just a funny - I mean seriously, Bikini Bottom? LOL - but stupid program to entertain kids. And some adults. What? It's funny! =)

- Posiedon

**Dear Ares**

**Why are you dating Aphrodite? I know she's all pretty and nice, but don't you, like, rip wings off butterflies in your free time and deep-fry puppies heads for dinner?**

**From WafflzRwolves**

_Punk..._

I SWEAR I AM GOING TO EFFIN' KILL YOU? I KNOW THAT YOU'RE AFTER APHRODITE! ...you better watch out... =.= A certain god of war is going to come kill you.

- Ares

**Dear Kronos, **

**What do you do for fun? I like to go dress shopping and ice-skating. Do you like dress shopping and ice-skating? What is your favorite colour? Mine is DEATH! Will you come to my birthday party? **

**With lots and lots of love**

**Princess**

Princess...?

WTF? You do know that I am the TITAN LORD? I do NOT like dress shopping - I'm a MAN - and ice-skating... you do know that I've been in pieces - literally - for almost all my life? Favourite colour... I hate colours. No I will not come to your birthday party... wait I'll come if I can take over one of the men's souls...

- Kronos (Soon to be King of the World)

* * *

><p><strong>...<strong>

**=O**

**=O**

**=O**

**Holy Zeus... =O =O =O So many reviews... so many questions... *passes out from exhaustion* *wakes up* *hugs everyone who reviewed even tighter* I LOVE YOU EVEN MORE NOW! =) =) =)**

**Hope you liked the answers... and I hope it was quite a quick update.**

**Okay, and I need to tell you... I'm sorry if any of the 'advice' parts don't work... *hides* Please don't kill me if they don't? I'm not the best person for advice, but I try my best - you can decide if you want to trust me, and if the advice doesn't work... please, please, please don't kill me... I have other stories to update too. =P**

**- Soulless Bloody Angel**

**P.S. I love the questions! Some of them have me LMAO =) Some really make me think about what I'm going to write... =)**


	6. Chapter 6

**Summary: Welcome to... ASK THE GODS! As previewed on percyjackson . co . Uk. Ask the gods questions in the reviews, and they will answer them! Maybe if the Titans are in a good mood they'll answer your questions too...**

**Disclaimer: I do not own Percy Jackson... or any of the questions as they are from my AWESOME reviewers. =)**

**Note: Bold is either a comment from me or a letter.**

* * *

><p><strong>Dear Posidon,<strong>

**Do you have any daughters, cause I might be one?**

**- Angelina**

Dear Angelina,

Firstly, one second, ZEUS, STOP THE THUNDER AND HADES, GET RID OF THE DEAD! Secondly, no, I don't have any daughters... sorry... DX I think I've blessed you though... I think... =)

- Posiedon

**Dear Hermes,**

**HEY DADDY, ILY. YOU ARE THE BEST THING SINCE FB!**

**ANY WAYS, does Red Bull give you wings?**

**- xKIEAxCHILDofhermes**

Dear xKIEAxCHILDofhermes,

Love you too =) Thanks =) =) =) =) I feel loved. XD EK! APOLLO GOT ME STARTED ON EMOTICONS! =.= NOT AGAIN! =.= THIS IS DRIVING ME NUTS! =.= ...

Anyway, no it doesn't. RED BULL LIES! NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO! D=

- Hermes

**Dear Zeus,**

**Sooo this means you're in a open relashionship at the memo ;)**

**- xKIEAxCHILDofhermes**

Dear xKIEAxCHILDofhermes,

OF COURSE I'M NOT! I'M MARRIED TO HERA! Actually... I am. Just don't let Hera see this letter... =) =) XD XD OH DAMN YOU APOLLO! YOU CAUSED ME TO START USING EMOTICONS AS WELL! =.= URGH!

- Zeus

**Dear Ares,**

**THIS IS SPARTA.**

**- xKIEAxCHILDofhermes**

WOOT! SPARTA RULES! YOU RULE PUNK!

- Ares

**Dear Demeter,**

**COME ON WEED IS GOOD FOR DAAH SOUL.**

**- xKIEAxCHILDofhermes**

I hate you now. =.=

- (a pissed) Demeter

**Dear Posiedon**

**First off let me say that you and your son Percy are each the embodiment of AWESOMENESS!**

**Now for the question, which do you like more Percabeth or Prachel and why?**

**How come you gave Pericylymus(Frank Zhang's ancestor) the power to change into animals but you didn't give it to Percy your favorite son?**

**Last one, do you think Pothena ever has a chance? (don't kill me for that last one please, I don't want to be a puddle of sea water though if you do want to kill me can you turn me into a dolphin?)**

**-nissi1216**

Dear nissi1216,

EK! SO MANY QUESTIONS! So...

Firstly, thank you =) We know =)

I prefer... Percabeth to tell you the truth. Sure, she's _Athena_'s daughter, but... she's good for him. Whereas Rachel is just weird... O.o

For your second question, it would be showing favouritism... and Amphitrite and Triton would kill me... XD But if I could, I would.

And for the last one... no. Just NO. ! NEVEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEER! =.=

- Posiedon

**Dear Lady Aphrodite *kneels***

**I gotta say that I've been a bit of a douche lately, I haven't seen my girlfriend in ages, and I hate myself for it X^| I act like an out going, idiotic, funny person, just to see her laugh (her laugh is nice) but really, I hardly speak to anyone outside of my friends and family, I really want to be a better boyfriend, I'm real herpa derp (it means stupid or idiot) and I hate it when people pester me about her, not because I'm ashamed, but because I don't want to stick my foot in my mouth and screw everything up. I know I'm asking a bit, sorry**

**Glivan (a nickname my cousins haven when drunk, it stuck)**

Dear Glivan,

You're so sweet, I'm not surprised you have a girlfriend. I think that you should be more yourself around her, but also the out going, idiotic funny person to make her laugh - but balance them, otherwise she'll either think you're emo - like Hades - or really stupid. Neither of those are any good. I understand how you hate people pestering you, and you have a right to, it can get really irritating, and I think that you should tell them to shut the ** (I'm a lady. I don't swear like _some _people) up.

Love Aphrodite

**Lady Artemis *knees***

**I am a guy, wait don't hurt me, but I share your out look on other male, a lot of them are prats (like Apollo), obnoxious (like Apollo), and I've always been raised by one main rule (along with the other important ones) hell hath no fury like a woman scorned, and I could agree more, I still have scars from the last time I pissed a girl off, It was an honest accident, the torture she put me through with just a toast, a spoon and a packet of mint I didn't even know was possible**

**Btw you're epic X^D screw Apollo, git**

**Glivan**

Glivan...

I might even like you. Key word being MIGHT. Yes, Apollo is a prat and is obnoxious but he's still my brother... and only _I _can insult him like that. But I like the thoughts =) (APOLLO! YOU IDIOT! YOU GOT ME STARTED ON EMOTICONS TOO! =.=)

Anyway, yes. Us girls can kick boys ass if they piss us off =) Toast, spoon and a packet of mint...? I like this girl you speak of. Who is she?

Ikr? =)

- Artemis

**Dear Gaia**

**If, and most likely when, you take over the world, can you please leave Ireland alone, we all miles away from Rome, Greece and America, we can give you cider and stout and cookies plus cake, no lie, just please leave Ireland alone, we treat the earth with respect**

**- Lankyman**

Er... I'll see...

- Gaia

**Lord Hades *kneels* **

**You do know that you have a huge undead arm at your back and call, yet all Zeus has is a metal rod that spends more time lodged up his ass than being used? So why don't you just over whelm him with the undead and talk Heaphestus into making shackles to lock him in? It would be fun.**

**- Lankyman**

Lankyman,

Well that would be fun... but... I don't know... I like arguing with Zeus... hm... I'll think about it. I'd like to do that... it'd be fun. Very fun. XD (APOLLO! =.=) I think I will do that... thanks dude! =)

- Hades

**Dear Apollo,**

**Why did you make Justin Bieber sing like a girl xD**

**- Nobody**

Dear Nobody,

I was bored... XD I'm sorry people of the Universe. I cursed you by sending you him... =) But I was bored.

- AWESOME Apollo

**Lady Athena *kneels***

**I read more hours a day than I do anything else, I have good mind for strategy, mainly because no one know what I'm thinking and random, so m'lady I bet you five pounds that I could bet you in a game of draughts/checkers easy, I grew up with the game and my granda, who I spend a lot of time with, is a pro at it, so Whaddya say, best two outta three? *grins***

**Glivan**

**P.S. I have a riddle for you to figure out at a later date if you wish to try it.**

Dear Glivan,

You. Are. ON. Be prepared to lose. You owe me five pounds. And what's the riddle? Tell me. NOW. Or you'll get a bunch of owls after you.

- Athena

**Dear Lord Zeus**

**Do you ever feel anything about the fact that Helios faded. I mean in your first encounter with Typhon he kinda beat you into the dirt and tore out your sinews, so in that version Hermes gathered the sinews and healed you while Helios distracted it. Afterwords you threw a mountain on top of Typhon, there for imprisoning him and inflicting a good old kenetic beat down. So since he, and Hermes were the ones who stood by you when no one else did, do you feel anything? Anything at all?**

**And also, aren't your really just Titans who call themselves gods as a political distinction since your parents were Titans?**

**Sincerley **

**Random Semi-Human**

**PS: Take into account he betrayed his family and the previous rulers of the world for you when only a couple others did.**

**PSS: I figured this was the more likely story to be true because it's mentioned the least and denied the most, no one likes negative, and or embarising press, especially Gods.**

Random Semi-Human...

TYPHON DID NOT BEAT MY INTO THE DIRT AND TEAR OUT MY SINEWS! THAT IS A LIE! I bet Posiedon or Hades wrote that... =.= Idiots. Anyway, I'm sorry that Helios faded - whenever a god/a few - actually one or two - Titans fades I'm sorry (Don't look at me like that!).

About the thing about us being Titans... yeah pretty much. But we're on two sides of a war so... that's why we're gods and they're Titans.

- Zeus

PS - I have

PPS: IT'S NOT THE MOST LIKELY! =.=

**Dear Lady Aphrodite,**

**Well I talked to one of the teachers on Friday and I got her to admit that she really liked the other teacher. Then, my friend on the boys b-ball team got the other teacher to admit his feelings! But now, we just need to get them to get the nerve to ask the other out. Do you have any suggestions and/or date places. I'm sorry if I am troubling you with all of these questions, its just that you are the relationship expert, and I couldn't ask anyone else cuz they would probably lie to me.**

**P.S. I am a demigod actually, a daughter of Apollo. And one of your sons just asked me out, Shaw.**

**Truly Yours,**

**SwimmerChick**

Dear SwimmerChick,

Aw... did you say yes to Shaw? =O =) 3

Sorry, distracted by LOVE =)

So... how to get them to ask each other out? Shoving them in a closet always works... =) Or if you see them in the same room with only a few people or you're the only person, somehow get the other people out or slip away silently. Make sure they notice. Then spy on them and see what happens. Bribing works too. =)

Date places... what city are you in? Gods, I sound like a stalker but it's necessary. Anyway, a restaurant, or a park, the beach or lake if there's one near. =)

And no problem! I love helping - and mucking stuff up but... =)

- Aphrodite

**Dear Artemis,**

**What's your average amount of Hunters per year? **

**P.S Can I join?**

**-Kirino Tsuki**

Dear Kirino Tsuki,

About... 6. It may not seem like many, but some Hunters - occasionally - die, some break their vow (=.=) and some decide to leave.

And of course you can join! =)

- Artemis

**Dear Hestia,**

**Why did you leave the Olympians anyway? **

**-Miss A**

Dear Miss A,

I left because otherwise there would be a civil war and if I stayed and Dionysus joined too, there would be too many seats of power. It was the best choice, but not the perfect one.

- Hestia =)

**Dear Iris,**

**You are one of the most awesome goddess out there~! Just wanted to tell you that and rainbows are awesome.**

**- RAINBOWS**

Dear RAINBOWS,

Aw... thanks... you make me blush =) (Urgh... Apollo...) And ikr?

- Iris

**Dear Hades,**

**If you HAVE TO choose, who would be the person you trust the most in the Olympians?**

**- Hope**

Would Hestia count as an Olympian, because it would have to be her. Apart from her... none of them. Well, maybe Hephaestus...

- Hades

**Dear Hades, **

**You just proved my theory, did you realise that? Chucking a fit over someone accusing you of having a bad temper... that's low man. Anyway, you're my second favourite god. Question: How much would you give to become the King of the Gods? **

**- Soozin Hevincarrr**

Dear Soozin Hevincarrr,

=.= I dislike you even though I'm your second favourite god... =.= The answer to the question... not much actually. I just want to humiliate Zeus and maybe Posiedon.

- Hades

**Dear Apollo, **

**I forgot to ask you a question last time! :O I'm a terrible person! You're god of the sun and all, do your kids glow in the dark or something, or are they more powerful in sunlight? **

**PS. You are really hot and awesome!**

**- Soozin Hevincarrr**

Dear Soozin Hevincarrr,

I'm hot and awesome and I know it =)

LOL. Anyway, uh... no they don't glow in the dark, but they're more powerful in sunlight... so in the day =)

- AWESOME Apollo

**Dear Gaia, **

**Nah I don't live in that hemisphere! So can you spare me from your ever-mighty, ever-amazing wrath? And how did water ever manage to take over like 80 percent of the Earth when you, are ruler over it (Earth referring to land)?**

**- Soozin Hevincarrr**

I'll see.. and... I was nice. No more comments.

- Gaea

**Dear Zeus, **

**Hey I'm seriously getting sick of all these summer storms, can you hold back on the thunder or something? And would you ever give up being King of the gods for anything? (like if you didn't Gaia would eat us all or something)?**

**- Soozin Hevincarrr**

Dear Soozin Hevincarrr,

I might... if I'm in a good mood. XD And I might but it depends on what the other option is. If it's the reign of the Gods ending... then yes, I'd give it up. If it was Hades complaining... then no. =)

- Zeus

P.S. Don't tell Apollo I'm going to ground him for introducing me to emoticons...

**Dear Aphrodite, **

**Did you invent chocolate? Because I'm in love.**

**- Soozin Hevincarrr**

Dear Soozin Hevincarrr,

How do they relate... - apart from on Valentine's Day? But yes. I did. XD

- Aphrodite

**Dear All The Gods;**

**What are your favorite colors?**

**- IWM**

Zeus - Sky Blue

Posiedon - Sea Green

Hades - Black

Hera - Royal Blue

Athena - Grey

Hephaestus - Orange/Red

Apollo - Yellow

Artemis - Silver

Hestia - Brown

Demeter - Cream

Ares - Blood Red

Aphrodite - Pink

Hermes - Green

Dionysus - Purple

- All the Olympians

**Dear Poseidon;**

**First, how do flying fish work, and second, how do fish swim?**

**- IWM**

Dear IWM...

This is hard to explain... for the first, they just do.

For the second... it's like asking how you breathe. It just comes naturally to them!

- Posiedon

**Dear Zeus;**

**How did you first get your Master Bolt? Isn't cool, zapping people you don't like?**

**- IWM**

Dear IWM,

I asked the Cyclops to make it for me and they made it. It's awesome isn't it? And yes. It's cool and FUN. REALLY FUN! =)

- Zeus

**Dear Awesome Apollo (I know you would love the title),**

**I love all genres of music too! What a coincidence. Oh yeah, I got two more questions relating to music. **

**1.) Who are your favorite singers / artists? (Just some of them)**

**2.) What are your favorite songs? (No need to mention all)**

**P.S Maybe if you're still confused about my gender, I'm a girl (dudette?)**

**- SiMpLiCiTy-iS-tHe-bEsT**

Dear SiMpLiCiTy-iS-tHe-bEsT,

I do love the title and COOL! =)

To answer the questions...

1) Simple Plan (dude, they are COOL!), Green Day, Justin Beiber (Only because he makes me crack up XD), Rihanna, Eminem, Black-Eyed Peas and HEAPS more.

2) ...too many to count. XD

- AWESOME Apollo

P.S. Coolio! XD

**Dear Demeter,**

**I love to eat cereals too! So, what are your favorite cereals?**

**- SiMpLiCiTy-iS-tHe-bEsT**

Dear SiMpLiCiTy-iS-tHe-bEsT,

I BLESS YOU NOW! XD =)

And... Weet Bix =) It is YUMMY!

- Demeter

**Dear Kronos, Lord of The Titans,**

**I'm so sorry for mistaking you with Chronos (The Father of Time) What can I do to redeem my mistake?**

**P.S You're one of my favorite characters in Percy Jackson series**

**P.S.S I wish you a success (and good luck) in doing your quest to overthrow Olympus**

**- SiMpLiCiTy-iS-tHe-bEsT**

Nothing. I hate you.

And um... okay? Thanks?

I WILL SUCCEED... eventually.

- Kronos

**Dear Hermes (Dad),**

**Does it bother you that have a purse brand named after you?**

**:)**

**I bought one as well!**

**- xKIEAxCHILDofhermes**

Dear xKIEAxCHILDofhermes,

Na... it's cute. XD

=)

And cool! =)

- Hermes

**Dear Gaea:**

**WHO LIVES IN A PINEAPPLE UNDER THE SEA?**

**-Dorky porky**

...I have no idea, and I don't care.

- Gaea

**Dear Poseidon (bows)**

**You are the BEST god EVAR! I also think you're the most powerful of the Three, because your sphere overlaps into Zeus' and Hades'. I mean, look at it! You can create powerful hurricanes and winds and you're the Storm Bringer, which is what Zeus does, and you can create really strong earthquakes like Hades can. And the ocean covers 70% of Gaea! WHY I NOT UR KID?**

**- Child of the Pool**

Dear Child of the Pool,

IKR? I'm like... the definition of awesome. XD

And... I don't know... I'm sorry... =( I blame Zeus. XD

- Posiedon

**Dear Athena,**

**I was just wondering... Why did you turn Arachne into a spider? Why don't you turn her into something, well, less poisonous and also less aggressive, like I dunno, worms?**

**-JustAnotherRandomKid**

Dear JustAnotherRandomKid,

I don't know... I guess it's just the first thing that came into my mind.

- Athena

**Dear Artemis,**

**First, how can you stand Apollo's haikus anyawy? And why do you like to turn men into Jackalope so much? Why not try something new?**

**-JustAnotherRandomKid**

**P.S: Oh, can you do me a favor by turning this annoying boy in my school into a jackalope for a day and tell your huntress to hunt him that one day? Lol, just kidding. No, seriously, can you?**

Dear JustAnotherRandomKid,

I don't know... I really don't know... and because it is fun =) Have you tried it? You should. It's great!

- Artemis

P.S. Sure. I need a name and address though.

**Dear Poseidon, **

**You're really awesome! **

**By the way, can you teach me how to surf sometimes? XP**

**-JustAnotherRandomKid**

Dear JustAnotherRandomKid,

I KNOW I AM! =)

And sure! I'm pro at it!

- Posiedon

**To all the Gods, **

**From all heroes that have ever lived, which one is your favorite?**

**-JustAnotherRandomKid**

Dear JustAnotherRandomKid,

We all agreed on Heracles. Apart from Athena who chose Daedlus (Weird woman) and Posiedon who chose Perseus Jackson (Idiot. Biased.).

- Zeus

**To Kronos**

**How does it feels to eat your kids? do they even taste good? And isn't it weird to have them growing up inside you stomach? Is it?**

**-JustAnotherRandomKid**

...no comment...

- Kronos

**Dear Apollo,**

**I tried, I really tried, to follow your tips... but the chocolate was so tempting... I did everything else, though. But I'm better now, and even though I'm still hacking up a lung every five seconds, I can sing the end of the Phantom of the Opera (the song) without a hitch (well, not including the problems I had before)... still can't get that high E, though... *sigh***

**Anyways, I told my little brother about this, and he wants to know what you think of Toby Keith's latest hit song, "Red Solo Cup". Our family loves it (even my little brother -I'm running for the hills when he turns 21), and we wanted to know your opinion of it.**

**Keep being awesome!**

**~Broadway Is LIFE**

Dear Broadway Is LIFE,

It would be hard... and good! Coolio! =) I might help you with the high E... maybe... if you pray... and donate stuff to me... XD =)

LOL... um... it's... alright... I suppose... but I prefer Runaway Baby by Bruno Mars. It's probably the song that highlights what I'm like... XD

I will!

- AWESOME Apollo

**Dear Kronos,**

**Do you mind if I call you Lord Voldemort?**

**~WeasleyAtHeart**

Yes I would mind it. So don't. =.= Or I kill you.

- Kronos

**Dear Artemis**

If you had to pick a mortal hunter out of all the famous girls (in any time period) in the world who would you pick?

- **xxxx can't stop me now xxxxx**

Dear xxxx can't stop me now xxxxx,

Most of the famous girls got obsessed with boys... so... none. =.= Sad...

- Artemis

**Dear Kronos,**

**What is your favorite color?**

**-pErCaBeThFaN-**

pErCaBeThFaN,

Gold. Don't ask why. It just is.

- Kronos

**Dear Athena, **

**Am I your daughter? It's because I'm a first honor in class and that some of my classmates called me a human dictionary.**

**-pErCaBeThFaN-**

Dear pErCaBeThFaN,

Uh... maybe, maybe not... lots of people are like that but... they're not always my children. Do you have blonde hair and grey eyes?

- Athena

**Dear Ares,**

**Ummmm I'm female and straight**

**From WafflzRwolves**

Oh...

- Ares

**Dear gods/goddesses**

**Do you ever watch your kids or important mortals in the shower? **

**- morbidly curious**

Yes. Don't you...?

No? Well... this is awkward...

Do do do do do do do...

La la la la la...

KIDDING. Do you think we're perverts? Urgh... we don't.

- All the Olympians

**Dear Poseidon and Athena, **

**Why do you hate each other so much?**

**Sincerely, thecoolkid12**

Dear thecoolkid12,

SO MANY REASONS... go on the computer and search up myths. We don't want to explain...

- Posiedon and Athena

**Dear Hera,**

**Peacocks are so pretty (: Did you create them?**

**-Bell**

Dear Bell,

Yes I did. =) And I know... they're beautiful... like me =)

- Hera

**Dear All The Gods,**

**What do you do when you are bored?**

**-pErCaBeThFaN-**

Dear pErCaBeThFaN,

...argue. Hang about. Argue. Go into the Mortal World. Argue. Have a discussion. Argue. Kill people we don't like. Argue. Help our kids/maidens (if possible). Argue. Cause chaos. And... argue.

- All the Gods

**Dear Posiedon,**

**Can you control people like puppets since 2/3 of people's bodies are made of water?**

**- Bonecollectors**

Dear Bonecollectors,

Yes... I can. XD But unfortunately none of the gods... =( Not cool. But... it's fun otherwise! XD

- Posiedon

**Dear Olympians/Kronos,**

**Who is your favorite son or daughter of all time (for Artemis, who's your favourite hunter?)**

**- Bonecollector**

****Zeus: ...too many...

Posiedon: PERCY!

Hades: Bianca

Hera: ...Ares... I suppose...

Demeter: Katie =)

Hermes: Luke... RIP...

Apollo: ...Michael... RIP Michael... =(

Athena: Either Daedlus or Annabeth...

Artemis: Zoe... RIP my dear maiden...

Aphrodite: Silena... RIP my darling daughter... =(

Hephaestus: Charlie. RIP...

Ares: CLARRISE!

Dionysus: Pollux and Castor. Equally. RIP Castor...

Kronos: None of them. They're all useless.

This is Zeus here... go away father. The rest of us agree.

- All the Gods and Kronos...

* * *

><p><strong>SO MANY QUESTIONS! OMFG!<strong>

**=) =) =)**

**So hard... but so fun!**

**I'm sorry at the end the replies got short... I spent the whole school day doing this XD =)**

**I love you all reviewers! Keep it up!**

**Review! Favourite! Alert! Read!**

** - Sanity Is Surreal**

**P.S. Yup, I changed my pen name... again XD**


	7. Chapter 7

**Summary: Welcome to... ASK THE GODS! As previewed on percyjackson . co . Uk. Ask the gods questions in the reviews, and they will answer them! Maybe if the Titans are in a good mood they'll answer your questions too...**

**Disclaimer: I do not own Percy Jackson... or any of the questions as they are from my AWESOME reviewers. =)**

**Note: Bold is either a comment from me or a letter.**

**Second note: READ AN AT BOTTOM! URGENT!**

* * *

><p><strong>Dear Hermes,<strong>

**Well, I am a mailpony, and every time I deliver mail, I get them switched up with my muffins because of my Derp eyes. Please tell me your secret to not mixing up mail with bakery products!**

**-Derpy Hooves**

Dear Derpy Hooves,

Uh... you're a pony...? Since when did ponies type...? ... anyway... um... mail looks nothing like muffins... or feels like it... (mind out of the gutter - I can't believe _I'm _saying that) so... yeah.

- (A creeped out/WTHified) Hermes

**Dear Apollo,**

**Hi Apollo, the name is Heartstrings and I heard you play the lyre; I do too. I am getting ready to audition for the biggest orchestra in the entire world of Equestria! Do you have any suggestions?**

**-Heartstrings**

Dear Heartstrings,

PRACTICE MAKES PERFECT! =) And I might bless you... and Equestria... isn't that like the word that's another word for horse? WTH? =O

- AWESOME Apollo (that is confuzzled)

**Dear Hermes,**

**I just wanted to say that you are SO TOTALLY AWESOME! I mean, like, the god of SPEED AND PRANKS! YOU ARE JUST THE MOST AWESOME THING EVA! *Bow downs to your feet* ALMOST AS RAD AS THE WONDERBOLTS! Almost. I've got, like, millions of questions, but I will only pick 2:**

**1. I want to play a prank on my egg-head best friend, I already cleared all 50 of my prank books, do you have any pranks up your sleeve?**

**2. I am the fastest pegasus pony to ever come from Equestria, and I want to audition for a flight team that I have idolized for my entire light, do you know any rad moves that can "WOW!" them?**

**-THE TOTALLY FREAKING SUPER RAD, AMAZING, AWESOME, ELEMENT OF LOYALTY RAINBOW DASH!**

Dear THE TOTALLY FREAKING SUPER RAD, AMAZING, AWESOME, ELEMENT OF LOYALTY RAINBOW DASH! (...no comment...),

Uh... thanks... sorry, still a bit creeped out... I think you're on a high. Stop with the sugar, mate.

1. Visit one of my many sites for ideas... some are: 101 prankz . tripod . com (take out the gaps) or www . april-fools . us (again, take out the gaps)

2. Posiedon would be better for this question, as a) He made horses so... he'd no more. b) He can ask a pegasus whereas I can't. =(

- Hermes (still creeped out)

**Dear Aphrodite, **

**My dear friend Twilight showed me this mysterious "Ask the Gods" help blog, I have gotten a break from my fashion designing to read a book about Greek Myths, finding out that you are the goddess of Beauty, which I hope that applies fashion, so I must ask, are red big heels in, or pink high heels in?**

**-Element of Generosity, Rarity**

Dear Element of Generosity, Rarity,

Red big heels are ALWAYS in. But the latest fashion right now are bright, vibrant, light colours so... pink high heels =)

- Aphrodite

**Dear Dionysus,**

***Giggle, Giggle* My name is *Hehehehe* Pinkie Pie! *HAHAHHAHA!* I heard that you are the god of parties! *HAHHAHAHAHAHHAHA!* I love throwing parties, too! *giggle giggle* Now, I was wondering, what is more important to a party, *hehehhehe* balloons, or streamers? *heehhehehehehheh!***

**-*Giggle* Element of Harmony, Pinkie pie :D *AHHAHHAHAHAHHAHHAHAHA***

Dear Ella of Harps, Pongo pill :**(**,

Er.. you're weird. Just telling you that. And are drunk. Even I don't get _that _drunk... I suggest a cheeseburger and water. Now... wine is the most important thing in a party - ECK! DON'T KILL ME FATHER! - but... streamers. They have a wave effect ;) If you know what I mean ;)

- Dionysus

**Dear Ares,**

**Well, a few weeks ago I went to a party for my egg-head friend, baby dragon birthday party, Spike.**

**So, I brought him a dumbbell, which he seemed to enjoy. Then he got more presents, went to become a greedy bastard, got bigger, went rampaging through the city while kidnapping my other friend, Rarity, we all had to stop him and save them both, blah blah blah. Anyway, after that whole fiasco, my friends started to plan another party for my friend Fluttershy, I was going bring another barbell, but my friends don't think thats such a good idea, mainly its because Fluttershy can't hold up anything more than a bunny, but thats why I thought it would be a good idea! To get stronger! What do you think?**

**-THE FREAKING AWESOME ELEMENT OF HARMONY, AND FUTURE WONDERBOLTS CAPTAIN, RAINBOW DASH!**

THE FREAKING AWESOME ELEMENT OF HARMONY, AND FUTURE WONDERBOLTS CAPTAIN, RAINBOW DASH!,

Er... the other gods told me about you ponies and I think you're all on high's... I dislike ponies anyway.

Anyway... er... yeah... great idea. I think all of us are creeped out by you lot know...

Going to hide - I mean, going to cause a war,

- Ares

**DEAR HERA**

**Why dont you just divorce Zeus' sorry a** and get yourself a real and trustworthy husband?**

**-mexhera4eva**

**P.S I think your cool, just a little mad that your husbands's cheater **

**P.P.S CHEAT BACK GIVE HIM A TASTE OF HIS OWN MEDiCINE.**

Dear mexhera4eva (er...)

I really wish I could do that, but that would break the rules of marriage, and as I'm the goddess of marriage, I must keep the rules... but I want to do that...

- Hera

P.S. Thanks =) (GR! APOLLO!)

P.P.S. ...I'll see... but probably not =(

**DEAR ARTEMIS **

**PLEASE DON'T TAKE THIS THE WRONG WAY, BUT... you treat men bad and constantly insult US, which is sexist and complain about how WE mistreat woman. Have you ever thought about laying off the insults?**

- **Mr. softpaws**

**P.S Cant you have relationship? There's nothing in your god description about it.**

**P.P.S Are you god of virginity of your own will**

**P.P.P.S I**** wish you and apollo would get along. My DAD [yes another male] says family shouldn't fight and I think its true.**

Dear Mr. softpaws,

=.= Well, I didn't start it, did I? You men started it by mistreating us, and unlike other women who just resign themselves to it, I fight back. And I compared to a few centuries ago, I've laid off the insults. Seriously.

- Artemis

P.S. I'm the goddess of MAIDENS. Does that clear the question?

P.P.S. Yes.

P.P.P.S. We do get along... apart from when he's being annoying and calls me 'lil' sis.

P.P.P.P.S. If I seem like I'm in a bad mood, but it's because of Apollo. He and Hermes played a prank on me... again. Payback time.

**Dear Olympians,**

**I noticed there is a god of war and a goddess of war strategy, but what about warrior's spirit?**

**- mjollnr98765 awsome hammer**

Dear mjollnr98765 awsome hammer,

After discussing this for... ages - an hour or so - we decided that Ares was the god of warrior's spirit... technically. Being the god of war, it just fits... hope that sorts that out!

- The Olympians

**Dear Apollo (Idk why I'm writing to you so often),**

**1: I need your opinion, does standing while singing help your voice? I'm asking you this 'cause I take singing lessons and my teacher told me to stand up while I sing, but I feel more comfortable sitting while singing... I was in a bad mood that day because I spent time writing letters for this all night without my parent's permission and fell asleep at about 1:00 am.**

**2: I need some inspiration for a song to write... any way you can help?**

**- (one of your most frequent writers) Jaya**

**PS: Sorry about the whole thing about Artemis having to sign off for my first letter... I feel guilty...**

**- Jaya**

Dear Jaya,

No problems! =) I like having people write to me. It makes me feel more important than I already am =) So...

1. (I'm gonna sound really technical now...) Standing while singing improves your voice performance dramatically, as it opens up your diaphragm and gives your lungs more room to breathe. Sitting up very straight is also good, but standing is definitely the way to go if you want the best sound of your voice.

Standing while singing also improves your body (not that my body needs any improving) and makes you look more professional (to get the laddiiiesss XD Wait... you're a girl... get the men... meh. Doesn't have the same affect...)

2. USE EVERYTHING! ANYTHING! Especially emotions. They help A LOT. =)

- Apollo

P.S. No probs XD It's okay XD

**Dear Aphrodite,**

**I'm still having trouble at my love life... But, there's a Christmas dance coming up at my school and I'm going to put in a song request for "Hit the Lights" by Selena Gomez. Do you think this might help the situation?**

**-Jaya**

Dear Jaya,

Hm... that's hard, as it depends on the trouble... and music isn't always the best option (EK! APOLLO! =( He ruined my newest clothes... =.= I am going to kill him.), but it may help. I think, the best thing you can do, is keep being yourself and wait. I may just bless you =)

- Aphrodite

**Dear Kronos,**

**To answer one of questions a while back, yes. I do want you to take over my soul. My life is boring.**

**- Jaccus Son of Chaos and Gaia**

...? O.o ... ... ... er... I'll see...

- Kronos

**Dear Vol- sorry, Kronos:**

**Can I call you Voldy, then?**

**-WeasleyAtHeart**

No. You can not.

- KRONOS (NOT VOLDEMORT OR VOLDY!)

**Dear Apollo, **

**Most hot and awesome, **

**What d'ya think of Artemis? **

**You are amazing.**

**- Soozin Hevincarrr**

Dear Soozin

I know I am XD =)

She's pretty cool... (LOL God of the Sun talking about coolness. XD) apart from when she doesn't admit that she's younger than me and keeps going on how annoying boys are. Then she's plain idiotic, stupid and annoying. =.=

- AWESOME Apollo

**Dear Zeus, **

**DONT GROUND APOLLO, IDIOT FACE! D:**

**Anyhoo... **

**Oh wait, the weather just got cold and wet again, I really shouldn't have said that. **

**Have you tried Vegimite? (Did/could you destroy whoever made it? Vegimite is disgusting.) **

- **Soozin Hevincarrr**

Dear Soozin Hevincarrr,

That wasn't very smart. Watch out.

And I would destroy Vegimite... it's disgusting. How do you mortals like it? Bleh.

- Zeus

**Dear Artemis, **

**Why do you hate guys? Girls emotions are so complicated, guys are so straightforward. If you're just jealous because men decided to lead the world first, and women humbled themselves before them, I really don't like you more. **

**P.S. This is a girl you're talking to, me. ō_ō**

- **Soozin Hevincarrr**

Dear Soozin Hevincarrr,

I do not hate boys because they decided to lead the world first, but because most of them treat women... in an unbelievable way. Do you know how many women are abused each day? Do you know what some girls, as young as 11 are forced into doing...

- Artemis

**Dear Ouranus, **

**You're so forgotten, yet so powerful. You could crush us all if Atlas moved. You could probably kill your wife without all the hassle of the " quest of the seven". Or would you crush us too? You haven't faded have you? Is it weird seeing your grandchildren ruling when you have equal power? Is it weird being able to see your great-great grandchildren? You have soooooooooooo many. Do you see your sons much? What would you like to tell Kronos? Sorry, a lot of questions.**

**- Soozin Hevincarrr**

Dear Soozin Hevincarrr,

Firstly, that is a lot of questions... I will try and answer them all. For your first question... yes. I would crush you too. Sorry, but I can not help it. And no, I am not faded, as I am answering you. If you sent Pan a letter then you wouldn't get a reply as he is faded... unfortunately. And yes, it is quite... 'weird' as children say now days, and I suppose I feel slightly apprehensive but... there's nothing I can do about it. And it isn't 'weird' seeing my great-great grandchildren; more like... amusing? No... hm... it is... I'll think of a word later. I don't see my sons much, and I don't know if I want to... especially after... certain things they've done. What would I like to tell Kronos? A lot of unpleasant things. A LOT.

- Ouranus

P.S. I found the word. It is entertaining.

**Dear Aphrodite, **

**To answer "how is love and chocolate related" you could ask Athena or read this. I've heard that (apart from tasting really nice) chocolate produces the same chemical your brain does when your happy or in love or something. Athena would know better. It's something complicated like that. And why is my sister not interested in any guys? I can't annoy her! :'(**

**- Soozin Hevincarrr**

Dear Soozin,

Ah... interesting... I'll ask her. I think.

And for some girls it just takes time for them to start thinking about boys differently. Just wait =) I'll make sure things start to kick in soon enough =) How old is she by the way?

- Aphrodite

**Dear Ares, **

**Why does war always make such a good movie? **

**- Soozin Hevincarrr**

I'm quoting Aphrodite here.

"War movies are so brilliant... there's so much drama... and there's always love... and that's why those movies are GREAT!"

I think that explains it...

- Ares

**Dear Athena, **

**Have you ever found the end to pi? Do you know why my grandpa drinks sooooo much prune juice?**

**- Soozin Hevincarrr**

Dear Soozin Hevincarrr,

Yes, I have =) You mortals only know 3. but it goes on even more... =) But I'm going to keep that a secret and wait for you to work it out... eventually XD And... er... no... sorry. It may be because he has... er... constipation often?

- Athena

**Dear Hera, **

**You really annoy me. Just thought you should know.**

**- Soozin Hevincarrr**

Soozin,

Watch out. =.=

- Hera

**Dear Athena (Goddess of AWESOMENESS and wisdom)**

**How come all your children have blonde hair and you have black hair?**

**Who started the stereotype that all blondes are dumb because that is definitely not true (I'm blonde and I happen to be very smart)?**

**I am terrible at remembering dates and History is my worst class do you have any suggestions to help me remember or at least get a better grade?**

**-nissi1216**

Dear nissi1216,

Ha ha ha, Goddess of Awesomeness? Hm... Athena, goddess of awesomeness and wisdom... it had a nice ring to it... =)

Er, well... um... this is awkward... but well... you see... as my children are brain children they are 'created' from my imagination so I can... well, picture what they look like... and I want to prove the stereotype wrong (actually I like blonde hair =) ) so... I choose that. =)

I have no idea. And I dislike that person. Hair colour does not affect someone's IQ level.

Well, the best way to remember something... well, it depends. If it's for a written test then write it out over and over again. At least 5 times, while letting the dates actually sink into your head. Not just looking at them and reading them. Study them. Think about them. Try and find links between years etc. It should help.

- Athena

**Dear Ares **

**Since your the god of war, do you play paintball, since it's a war game? If so, what gun do you have, because I have a project salvo with a apex barrel?**

**- bonecollector**

Bonecollecter,

Na, I don't play paintball? Ya know why? 'cause it's not really war. Only war is cool. Nothing else... apart from maybe Baseball... Baseball with the gods is pretty cool. =) We can use our powers and it's AWESOME! =) Anyway, the only thing I play - as in a game (not other things ;) ) - is war. It's the awesomest thing ever.

- Ares

**Dear Dionysus **

**What do you think of the song, Red Solo Cup?**

**- bonecollector**

Dear bonecollector,

It. Is. GREAT! =) That's all I can say... =) HAPPPPPPPPPPPPPY! And no Zeus, I did not have wine! XD XD XD Oh wait... Jacob's Creek is a wine brand isn't it... uh oh... EEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEK!

- Dionysus

**Dear Lady Aphrodite,**

**Well, first, I said yes :), and we have been dating for a week. And now to get down to business. Me and the boys b-ball team decided to take action. So, I led the one teacher down to the supply closet and told her that I needed something. Then, I had my guy friend bring down the guy teacher and told him to get something out of there. As soon as we went inside, we bolted the door shut, and locked it. We put cameras in the closet to spy on them, and it was sooo cute! They were talking and laughing and then they kissed! It was sooo romantic! We had to eventually let them out, but now they lovee each other! So, thank you for all of your help, I have really appreciated it. I look up to you for relationship advice, and none of this would have been possible without you :)**

**-Thanks!**

**SwimmerChick**

Dear SwimmerChick,

WHOOP, WHOOP, WHOOP, WHOOP, WHOOP, WHOOP, WHOOP, WHOOP! IT WORKED! Well of course it did with me helping but still =) And I'm glad to know you and Shaw are together =) Good luck together! =)

Love Aphrodite

**Dear Lord Apollo,**

**Hi daddy! It's you know, your daughter Elizabeth? Anyway, I had a little question for you. Would you want to come to my violin recital next Tuesday? If you could come that would be awesome! I love you dad cuz your awesome!**

**-Love your awesome daughter :)**

Dear Elizabeth,

Next Tuesday... hm... what time? I'll see cause all the gods are currently trying to hunt me down for getting them to like emoticons DX and... yeah... I'll try to come, but I don't know...

- Love AWESOME Apollo XD XD XD XD

**Dear Lady Athena *kneels, while holding chess board***

**Here is the riddle; A man walks up and pulls out a picture of a young man and says; 'Brothers and sisters, I have none, but that mans father, is my fathers son.'**

**It took me 2 hours to figure out, thank my granda for it, the crazy coot is obsessed with riddles**

**Glivan**

Dear Glivan,

Ah that was simple! I figured it out in a few seconds, and I'm sure I'm right! It's a picture of himself of course! =)

- Athena

**Dear Hermes,**

**I once knicked, a cheese burger from a guys hand and replaced it with a rock, he didn't notice, he's now missing 3 teeth and is currently hunting me like a pissed off Artemis (no offence, don't hurt me) how's that for a prank?**

**Glivan**

Dear Glivan,

Dude... that was cool... =) Nice job dude. XD =) You've done well and have achieved master thief. I'm... Lord of Thieves so... good luck working your way up XD Keep me updated!

- Hermes

**Kronos,**

**Is it true that you are a cookie thief? If so *demonic voice* I will burn you until you are ashes then throw you into the ocean and blow you up (sorry Poseidon) because no one steals my COOKIES!**

**Glivan**

...what is this world coming to...? I didn't know mortals could sink THIS low...

- Kronos

**Dear Hestia, **

**The hearth is a beautiful place to be isn't it? Nice and calm and relaxing, especially if you have a book (I'm Athena's grandson, believe it or not) **

**Glivan**

Dear Glivan,

It's nice to know that someone apart from me realizes the true beauty of the hearth. Yes, it is beautiful and it is extremely relaxing... if you ever feel worried, go to a heart, sit down, and close your eyes... after a few minutes... you'll feel at peace.

- Hestia

**Dear Lady Artemis *knees***

**The girl I told you of, is called Amy, she is my older sister, she is 6 inches smaller than me but still scares the crap outta me and i'm 6ft 3**

**Btw, could you turn this boy at my friends school into a Jackalop (sp?) he is a pervert and my female friend hates him but as per school rules and the law she can't do anything leathal to him and all the pranks I did on him won't work either (and I came up with some pretty messed up shit) please help if you can.**

**Glivan**

Dear Glivan,

Ha ha XD Height doesn't matter when it comes to scariness. FOUND YOU! Oh whoops, sorry, I've got this on speech recognition and I just found Apollo and - damn it! He's gone! Damn, damn, damn. Ah well, he can't hide forever. XD

Anyway, it's jackalope and... hm... I could pay him a visit... or... XD Do you know any of his fears? Also, find as much information about him as possible, like what his daily pattern is after school, who his crush (BLEH) is, etc. Then... then I can help you the most =)

- Artemis

**ARES, **

**My friends keep saying I'm a kid of yours just because I get in fights and punch people and break stuff when I get mad and wear leather and want a motorcycle when I grow up and love rock and do dumb, dangerous shit as a hobby. It irritates me because your a jerk and I don't want you as my dad (although badass fighting powers wouldn't be unwelcome...). Can I please get a confirmation that I AM NOT YOUR KID? And I know you'll be pissed that I insulted you, but I'm not the type to sugarcoat stuff.**

**- Punk and Proud Of It**

Kid,

You've got spunk. But you're not my kid, cause NONE of my kids insult me. Well, Mars' kids might but MINE DON'T! Go tell your stupid friends you're not my kid, jerk.

- Ares

**POSEIDON, **

**What are your thoughts on that huge oil spill last year? It's supposed to really screw up the ocean for awhile. And would you tell me what REALLY happened? Because I don't believe for one minute that us mortals caused it, how could we screw up something as huge as the sea?**

**- Punk and Proud Of It**

Dear PaPOI (I feel lazy),

That oil spill was not my fault. It was Zeus'. =.= Stupid git decided to ruin my beautiful ocean cause he was JEALOUS. =.= And it caused a disaster! I had to get so many animals cleared out of the area... and so many animals died... =( Zeus has paid for that though XD

- Posiedon

**Dear Olympians,**

**If I am a demigod who am I a son of? I am intelligent, brave, loyal, loves eagles, egotistical, good singer and author, don't like breaking rules, bossy, I love to read, am scared of spiders, have many friends, have dark brown eyes and hair, and loves pranks, but can be calm when I want to. So who am I the son of?**

**- nonameavailable**

Dear nonameavailable,

You see, many demigods have personalities that fit for every single god. But you see, Athena has claimed you, so... you're a child of Athena.

- Zeus on behalf of the Olympians

**To Posiedon,**

**How does it feel to have your son, Percy, being paired with all the boys at camp? Percy x Luke, Percy x Jason, Percy x Travis, just to name a few. Oh, and how do you feel about being paired with Apollo?**

**Signed, TrollKastell**

Dear TrollKastell,

It's... disturbing. And... annoying, as Aphrodite keeps on going on how about cute it would be... and I just sit there thinking, What. In. The. Name. Of. Hades? And then we get into arguments... again. And about me and Apollo... let's just say, it's more awkward when we're around each other now... especially if we're alone... =.=

- Posiedon

**Eh. Gaea. **

**Fine you are mean! Don't kill me! Do the research! And tell me! Am I annoying! I like Ritz crackers! Do you like them! **

**Dorky Porky**

**P. S. If you call me a Dorky porky then I'll call you a dirt filled pothole. **

Dorky Porky (what else am I supposed to call you, you ridiculous mortal?),

Yes I'm mean. Spongebob Squarepants...? Honestly? You mortals are... disturbingly odd. No, I don't like Ritz crackers.

- Gaea

**Dear the Awesomer, All-Powerful Lord Poseidon (bows low)**

**Actually how did Zeus and Hades react? (grins mischievously)**

**And do you think that you've blessed me or something? Not to be arrogant but I'm actually really loyal and can beat everyone in the swimming race. I seem to be more... I dunno, powerful in the water than anywhere else, especially the sea. **

**Girl of the Pool**

**P. S. Did you like the title? :D**

Dear Girl of the Pool,

I LOVE THE TITLE! =) That's going to be my sign off from now on! XD

React? To...? O.o

And I think I have... actually I'm pretty sure I have. =)

- Awesomer, All-Powerful Lord Posiedon XD XD XD

**Dear Lady Hestia,**

**You're one of my top 3 favourite gods. The others are Poseidon and Artemis. I like you because you're simple, humble, but also humming with this sense of quiet power. You never really kill anybody out of spite and you're the Peacemaker of Olympus. **

**From, **

**Tender of the flames, Jr.**

Dear Tender of the flames, Jr,

Why thank you, it's nice to know I'm appreciated. It's always nice to hear a compliment, isn't it? I guess, that's one of the things that make us gods more like mortals than we think so... but don't let the Olympians see that. They'd be extremely mad at me... I don't see why they don't accept this...

- Hestia

**To Athena,**

**Which one do you prefer: Percabeth or Lukabeth**

**-JustAnotherRandomKid**

Dear JustAnotherRandomKid,

I don't really mind as long as Annabeth is happy, but... I have to admit... I may prefer Percabeth, as a) Luke is dead (RIP), and b) ...he's 7 years older than her.

- Athena

**To Apollo,**

**Can you write a limerick? :p**

**-JustAnotherRandomKid**

**P.S: Just extra random question, is Justin Bieber your son?**

Dear JustAnotherRandomKid,

This is the Olympian Message Association. Apollo is currently unavailable to answer, as he is being hunted down, along with Hermes, by Artemis for breaking her bow and once again, flirting with her Lieutenant, Thalia Grace. He will reply as soon as possible.

- OMA

P.S. We can answer the last question: No. JB isn't Apollo's son.

**To Artemis,**

**What do you think about Thalia's leadership?**

**-JustAnotherRandomKid**

**P.S: Aaaw, that's to bad. I don't know where he lives D: **

Dear JustAnotherRandomKid,

This is - once again - the Olympian Message Association. Artemis is currently unavailable to answer, as she is hunting down Apollo and Hermes because they broke her bow and once again, flirted with her Lieutenant, Thalia Grace. She will reply as soon as possible. Oh wait! We just IMed her and got an answer. We quote: 'Thalia is an excellent Lieutenant, always working to her full potential and being one of the best Lieutenant's I've had. Her leadership is brilliant... but she needs to control her temper.' - Artemis

- OMA

**To Hermes,**

**When you get your title as 'God of Thieves,' did you get insulted? And also, Is Bill Gate your son? And is Mark Zuckerberg your son too?**

**-JustAnotherRandomKid**

**P.S: Why do you like to slow my internet down so much? D:**

Dear JustAnotherRandomKid,

Na, not insulted. Honoured. ;) Wouldn't you be?

And Bill Gates isn't my son.. but Mark is =)

And I love annoying people! So I slow their Internet down! Why do you think Sanity Is Surreal can't get chapters up fast enough ;)

- Hermes

**To Poseidon,**

**Yay! Let's try to surf in Bali XP **

**Anyway, what do you think about Percy? What makes you proud of him the most? **

**-JustAnotherRandomKid**

Dear JustAnotherRandomKid,

Sure =)

Percy's... brilliant. There aren't enough words to describe him. The thing that makes me proudest is probably... his loyalty. It's his fatal flaw, but still. It's amazing how loyal he can be, and I'm proud that he's my son.

- Awesomer, All-Powerful Lord Posiedon

**To Ares,**

**Do you prefer to fight with a shield and a sword or two swords? And did you invented bomb? **

**-JustAnotherRandomKid**

JustAnotherRandomKid,

I prefer fighting with a shield and a sword, as this keeps both my defence and offence up. And yes, I did invent the bomb. It's awesome, eh?

- Ares

**To Kronos,**

**Aaaw, why no answer my question? Fine, then answer this:**

**How does it feels when you get sliced into thousand pieces and thrown into Tartarus? And how does Tartarus looks like? Don't you get annoyed by the monsters growling and howling down there?**

**-JustAnnotherRandomKid**

JustAnotherRandomKid,

I like annoying you so...

No comment.

- Kronos

**To Zeus,**

**Why are you so upset lately? Stop giving us storms and throwing lightning bolts randomly, it's creepy! Please? I'll give you a package of ambrosia... Maybe... If you want... **

**-JustAnotherRandomKid**

Dear JustAnotherRandomKid,

Right now, I'm just annoyed that Posiedon got a title that's actually... pretty cool... (don't tell him I said that!) And I might... maybe... =/

- Zeus

**Dear All The Gods;**

**What's your favorite foods (And did you create them?) ?**

**And...What would you like your mortal names to be if you HAD to choose?**

**- IWM (You can also call me Alice)**

Dear Alice,

We all agreed, our favourite food was ambrosia. =)

And... this is what we chose for names.

Zeus - Jack (I don't know why, but I like that name =) )

Posiedon - Dylan (XD)

Hades - Blake

Apollo - I dunno why I like this name but... Aaron.

Hermes - Hm... Michael

Artemis - Diana =)

Aphrodite - Belle

Hera - Anna

Demeter - April

Athena - Alina

Hephaestus - James

Ares - Marcus

Dionysus - George

Hestia - Harmony

Most of us just randomly chose the names... we don't know why we like them...

- The Olympians

**Dear Apollo;**

**I LOVE Music! Do you like Wizard Rock? Whose your fave band in W-Rock? Fave song by that band? And, I'm sorry, but Justinette Beaver(My Name for the jackalope) sincerely sucks. Jus' sayin'**

**- IWM (You can also call me Alice)**

Once again, Apollo is unavailable. Sorry.

**Dear Artermis;**

**You see what I did there? Jackalope!**

**- IWM (You can also call me Alice)**

Once again, Artemis is also unavailable. Sorry.

**Dear Hephaestus;**

**I really think you're really awesome. Couldn't you be able to overthrow Hera, because you could make armies of things, then set them on her. That would be funny :)**

**- IWM (You can also call me Alice)**

Dear Alice,

Hm... I'm going to get to work... this is going to be extremely fun. I owe you a favour for the idea =)

- Hephaestus

**Dear Poseidon;**

**YOU LIE! Fish have these balloon things in their bodies, when they puff it up, they float up, and when they deflate it, they go down. For a second I was ashamed to be your daughter. **

**- IWM (You can also call me Alice)**

Dear Alice,

You really believe that? That's science, and science is RUBBISH. IT IS JUST SOME PEOPLE TRYING TO BE SMART! Science. Is. Not. Real. Us Greek Gods are, and what we says goes! Okay? And... one second... but you can't be my daughter as I only had one kid - Percy - and shi - shoot... Zeus and Hades are out to kill me now... but I swear, I only had Percy! Maybe you're Triton's child! EK! I need to go hide... unfortunately... or we're going to have another war...

- Awesomer, All-Powerful Lord Posiedon

**Dear Hades and Poseidon;**

**You are both extremely awesome.**

**- IWM (You can also call me Alice)**

We know. =)

Wait... Posiedon? I need to kill you. (This is Hades right now)

(This is Posiedon) I need to run. Bye!

- Hades and Awesomer, All-Powerful Lord Posiedon

**Dear Hera;**

**Do brown cows give chocolate milk, and white cows give vanilla milk, and pink cows give strawberry milk?**

**- IWM (You can also call me Alice)**

Dear Alice,

No. That is a lie.

- Hera

**Dear Sanity is Surreal;**

**Too true, too true. **

**- IWM (You can also call me Alice)**

Dear Alice,

Ikr? One minute... to what? O.o XD

- SIS (I love my initials XD)

**Dear Zeus;**

**Can I please be the goddess of insanity and creativity and all randomness in the world?**

**- IWM (You can also call me Alice)**

Dear Alice,

Sorry, but we are currently not accepting any new gods or goddesses... check back in a few hundred years and I'll see.

- Zeus

**Dear All the Gods and Goddesses,**

**What do you like to argue about?**

**Do you like Percabeth or Thalico?**

**Why do all demigods get dyslexia or ADHD?**

**-pErCaBeThFaN-**

**P.S. I don't have blond hair or green eyes... I have black hair with brown on the tips and brown eyes.**

Dear pErCaBeThFaN,

We like to argue about... pretty much everything. =)

We all agreed... Percabeth. Cause the rest of us get to annoy the Hades out of Posiedon and Athena and they're happy for their kids... =) Everyone's happy.

Firstly, not all demigods get dyslexia or ADHD. It can depend who the godly parent is, or what the mortal parent was like or... well there are a lot of factors, but for demigods who do have dyslexia or/and ADHD, then the dyslexia means that they can't read English because they're brain is wired to read Ancient Greek instead, and they can't adjust to English as well. ADHD just means heightened senses and means you see more than the average mortal.

- The Olympians

P.S. That's... nice...?

* * *

><p><strong>I FINALLY FINISHED! OMFG! THIS IS OVER 6000 WORDS! =) I LOVE YOU GUYS! It's hard work but... THANK YOU FOR THE REVIEWS! OVER 90 REVIEWS NOW! =O XD<strong>

**Okay, I always forget to write this so I need to write it now... I'm adding something else to this... guess what it is... =)**

**Na, I'll be nice... it's... ASK THE DEMIGODS! YES MY BRILLIANT READERS AND EVEN MORE BRILLIANT REVIEWERS, YOU CAN NOW ASK YOUR FAVOURITE DEMIGODS QUESTIONS! =) Keep the questions rolling in guys!**

**Hope that makes you guys happy =)**

**And... THANK YOU TO ALL MY REVIEWERS! I LOVE YOU!**

**Okay, and now... a small... complaint? No... request to only SOME of you. To most of you, you don't need this but to others... PLEASE, PLEASE, PLEASE don't ask questions in only text language - I don't mind a bit of text language but... not too much text language please - and also please check your grammar... otherwise, I spend more time editing the question, rather than answering it.**

**Thanks =)**

**Oh and SwimmerChick... seriously... did it work? =O =O =O I have no interest in boys myself... and if that bought them together for real... OMFG... =O**

**And to Glivan... I hope I'm right... otherwise I've just made Athena seem stupid. DX It seriously took me two minutes... maybe - if it's right - Athena just didn't want me to screw up... XD =) I love riddles... keep asking Athena riddles? PLEASE? =)**

** - Sanity Is Surreal**

**P.S. Yup, I changed my pen name... again XD**


	8. Chapter 8

_**Summary: Welcome to... ASK THE GODS! As previewed on percyjackson . co . Uk. Ask the gods questions in the reviews, and they will answer them! Maybe if the Titans are in a good mood they'll answer your questions too...**_

_**Disclaimer: I do not own Percy Jackson... or any of the questions as they are from my AWESOME reviewers. =)**_

_**Note: Bold is either a comment from me or a letter.**_

_**READ AN AT BOTTOM! URGENT!**_

* * *

><p><strong>Dear Kronos,<strong>

**Why did you lie about the cookies?**

**- nissi1216**

nissi1216,

I DON'T KNOW ANYTHING ABOUT COOKIES! PEOPLE STOP BUGGING ME! =.=

- Kronos

**Dear Artemis, **

**You are AWESOME!**

**Why do you not like all men? I mean I know that most men can be rude, obnoxious, self-centered, evil, messy, idiotic... I'm sorry what were we talking about. Oh right my question. So anyway most men are like that but not all. I have a lot of guy friends who aren't like that at all. I can actually stand to be around them for more than a few minutes without wanting to kill them which is an amazing feat.**

**I don't get why people won't except the fact that you are a MAIDEN goddess. Is it really that hard to understand. Did you know there are Artemis/Percy fanfics? I mean come on you are a MAIDEN you will not ever go out with Percy because you are a MAIDEN how many times must I say**

**- nissi1216**

Dear nissi1216,

Thank you.

You see... in Ancient times, men weren't like _some _men are now - the nice kind. And old habits die hard or, in this case, you could say, old hatred dies hard. So... that's the answer.

**Dear Frank Zhang,**

**Do you love Hazel?**

**P.S. You are so AWESOME I mean seriously you can turn into freakin' animals**

- **nissi1216**

Dear nissi1216,

Er... are you allowed to ask extremely personal and awkward questions. OI! AUTHOR! GET OVER HERE!

_Mhm? The Chaos Creator here, how can I help you?_

Stop talking like a... receptionist.

_Fine. What do you want?_

Are they allowed to ask extremely personal and awkward questions.

_...let me read the question... hm... ;) Yes ;)_

I hate you.

_I love you too - sisterly! I'll leave the real love for Hazel!_

Shut up.

_PEACE OUT! (Yeah, I'm on a high from over 100 reviews - CELEBRATION)_

...weirdo. Any way... yeah... I love her... (Hazel. Not the Chaos Creator)

(_BLEH)_

(I though you'd gone!)

(_=.= I'm writing your replies after you tell me what to write... OF COURSE I'M NOT GONE YOU IDIOT! =.= Stupid sons of Ares.)_

(Mars)

_(...Mars is cooler than Ares, but Greeks are cooler than Romans)_

(Oi. Roman here.)

_(Meh.)_

_(_You realize we're still like... replying to a letter?)

_(Whoops...)_

- Frank Hazel

P.S. I know ;)

**Dear Leo Valdez, **

**You are so AWESOME and EPIC and COOL and... well you get the point**

**Why are you not my boyfriend?(I would be perfect for you)**

**- nissi1216**

Dear nissi1216,

I know I am ;) SEE JASON? SEE PIPER? SOMEONE ADMITS THAT I AM AWESOME AND EPIC AND COOL! BUT NO ONE'S DONE THAT FOR YOU! ;) =)

When and where can we meet? =)

- Leo

**Dear Hermes**

**Am I your son? I'm pretty good at stealing stuff, my friends can almost never tell when I'm walking up on them, I surprise so many people when I sneak up on them, and I'm pretty good at making weapons out of anything and causing trouble.**

**-Experimental Agent 1123(aka Seth)**

Dear Seth,

Hm... I'm pretty sure I do have a son called Seth... =)

I'll send a satyr along to your school - watch out for the monsters!

- Hermes

**Dear Athena**

**I have a friend who is ...the definition of dumb blonde {in the nicest way}. Anyways tomorrow we have a very important math test and she told me if she fails she would be left back so um-mm bless her or something because I don't want to be left back. Just for the day.**

**- Sammy12303 **

**p.s thank you**

Dear Sammy12303,

Firstly, DUMB BLONDE IS NOT TRUE =.= My children have blonde hair and they're not dumb are they? Anyway, I'll see what I can do. But there's always a price... or a sacrifice needed.

- Athena

**Hello Lady Aphrodite!**

**Sorry to be a bother. He is very faithful. Him and I got in a fight for telling him that his girlfriend is such a bi***. I don't know why, but everytime I see him I want to punch him and hug him. He is NOT A PLAYER. As I said, faithful. He and I are just friends. What if he likes me? How can I tell for sure he likes me? HELP ME PLEASE! I'm hopeless at romance. :(**

**- Ali**

Dear Ali,

Ah... those fights for love... I love them. ;) If he likes you, he may touch you more often - mind out of the gutter - as in, holding your hand, a casual hug, etc. Or he may try and get your attention more, get annoyed when you ignore him or talk to other guys or you do something stupid which hurts you. There are lots of other signs but those are the... starting signs.

If you need any more help, just tell me =)

Love Aphrodite =)

**Dear Olympians, **

**NOOOOOOOO! I AM TO AWESOME TO BE A SON OF ATHENA (no offence)! I am a son of Zeus! And also, what would happen if Kronos was nicer?**

**- nonameavailable**

**P.S. Dionysus, I think I know a loophole to your punishment... root beer.**

Dear nonameavailable,

You have two angry gods who want to talk to you, and two mildly amused gods. So... first we'll show you the angry gods' replies, then the other two.

Athena - =.= Watch out. You've made me your enemy. You. Are. Screwed. I have taken offence.

Zeus - ARE YOU TRYING TO GET ME KILLED? HERA, POSIEDON AND HADES ARE AFTER MY BLOOD NOW! I swear I had no kids apart from Jason and Thalia during the time when the oath was on. And now I, the king of gods, have to hide because of you. =.= You have just gained another enemy.

Ooh... feel sorry for you mate. =( At least it's not Hades instead of Zeus... _that _would be scary. Hades and Athena against you... anyway, now the two mildly amused gods.

Hermes - Eh. This is entertaining to watch. Dad getting shouted at by his wife and two older brothers... and then Athena fuming in her throne. Thanks kid ;) Gave us all some entertainment. And then Ares is yelling, "FIGHT!" continually, and I'm pretty sure one's about to break out. While they're arguing, I'll give you the answer to your question. There's no chance of Kronos ever being nice. Never. Ever. Not in a million, billion, trillion years. So... yeah. BTW, watch out for Hades and Posiedon trying to kill you. Oooh... nice job. 4 gods pissed at you with one question. Sweet moves.

Dionysus - Sometimes I have root beer... but really it's quite... bleh. It's not wine, meaning it's no good.

- The Chaos Creator

**I know this has been asked before, but would you ever consider maybe having an alliance with Artemis Fowl? Since he is incredibly awesome? I mean, he even referenced you in the Eternity Code mess, and the Opal deception mess, sooooo...**

**- Artemis is beast**

Dear Artemis is beast (nice pen name by the way),

Um... an alliance? Not with a boy, even if he has referenced me. He's a boy. He has no chance.

- Artemis

**Greetings, Wise ones . . . and Semi-wise ones!**

**To everyone: If you could take on the job of another god for a day, who would it be, why, and how would you overlook your day?**

**May you please help me find my immortal parent? *puppy-dog eyes***

**Which celebrity would you go gay for? ;)**

**What do you think of the Sims games?**

**What do you think of Anime/Manga, and additionally "yaoi"?**

**If you were a mortal, what career path would you undertake and why?**

**Have any of you ever thought about seeking family counselling?**

**To Lord Apollo: Who is the most powerful fire user among you, Hestia, and Hephaestus?**

**Being the god of music, are you a good singer?**

**To Lord Poseidon: First of all, you are my favorite! May I hug you, please?**

**Secondly, have you ever thought about dying your hair red? 'Cause I always imagined you as a fiery redhead in the myths. ^_^**

**Lastly, who created rain, you or Zeus? Or did the two of you collaborate on the matter?**

**To Lord Hades: Do you know any vampires or creatures of the night?**

**How does it feel to control shadows or darkness?**

**How often do you hang out or bond with your younger brothers?**

**To Lady Artemis: Who was your first hunter?**

**What is it like to have a brother like Apollo?**

**To Lady Athena: How many books do you own?**

**Do you have a personal library? If so, may I take a look at your collection? I just adore the smell of Literature!**

**To Lady Aphrodite: Have you ever fallen in love or lust with a woman?**

**To Lady Hestia: It's a pleasure to see you included, miss "Mistress of the Hearth"!**

**So, what is it like to be the eldest sibling?**

**To Lord Ares: WHAT WAS YOUR LEAST FAVORITE WAR, PUNK?**

**To Lady Persephone: What is it like living in the underworld for half of the year? **

**To Lady Hecate: Is it possible for a demi-god who is not your child to learn your craft, or is it merely exclusive to your children?**

**Would you ever play World of Warcraft?**

**To Lord Dionysus: Is it true that once you're inebriated, you can be a real party animal? :D**

**To Lord Hephaestus: Does it ever get demanding being the blacksmith for Olympus?**

**To Lord Zeus: Why do you and Poseidon dislike each other so much, anyway?**

**Do you like the song "I Believe I Can Fly"?**

**If you had fallen in lust with a lesbian, how would you win her affections or get her attention?**

**To Lady Hera: Is there a god or goddess of divorce? If so, do you often quarrel with that person?**

**If you're the goddess of motherhood(from what I've read), then who is the god of fatherhood?**

**To Lord Hermes: What do you do for April Fool's Day?**

**Do you have a favorite comedian?**

**Sincerely, **

**The Lord of a Thousand Questions.**

Dear The Lord of a Thousand Question,

...that's a lot of questions... we'll answer as many as possible... I guess... we'll put the question first, then the answer.

**May you please help me find my immortal parent? *puppy-dog eyes***

If you give us some information on your personality and how you look... sure?

**Which celebrity would you go gay for? ;)**

PERSONAL. Sorry. =P

(OI! AUTHOR! GET RID OF THAT EMOTICON!)

_(Sorry... but I know Apollo says he'll go gay for Tom Felton!)_

(OI! DX YOU DON'T TELL THE WORLD THAT! DX)

_(I'm not surprised really... if you tried to bake something on him, it would burn... ;) )_

(...)

(Sorry, fangirl moment ;) )

**What do you think of Anime/Manga, and additionally "yaoi"?**

...um... this is kind of... another... personal... thing...

(_Isn't yaoi like..._)

(Yes.)

_(AWKWARDNESS)_

**Have any of you ever thought about seeking family counselling?**

(_I LAUGH AT YOU.)_

_(FAR OUT! WHAT WAS THAT FOR?)_

(We laugh at you.)

No. We have not thought about seeking family counselling (Hera don't give me that look) because all immortal families are - as Apollo says - screwed up.

So... no.

**To Lord Apollo: Who is the most powerful fire user among you, Hestia, and Hephaestus?**

ME! Duh.

(_LIAR! It's Hestia =) I'm smart.)_

Ignore the author. She's a pain.

(=) _He he..._)

**Being the god of music, are you a good singer?**

DUH.

(_What's with you lying so much? You sound worse than Hera in the shower!)_

(...you know this how...? O.O)

(_I got told by someone..._)

(OOH! LET MY GUESS! ZEUS TOLD YOU!)

(_Yeah...)_

**To Lord Poseidon: First of all, you are my favorite! May I hug you, please?**

Sure =)

(_PEDO ALERT!)_

(... =.=)

(We're laughing at you Posiedon. - The rest of the Olympians)

(Shut up.)

**Secondly, have you ever thought about dying your hair red? 'Cause I always imagined you as a fiery redhead in the myths. ^_^**

...O.O I'm the god of the SEA which is blue/green.

(_So you're going to die your hair BLUE AND GREEN? WTF? O.O)_

**To Lord Hades: Do you know any vampires or creatures of the night?**

Yes. Edward Cullen.

(_WAIT! WHAT? HE'S REAL?_)

(Please don't... what was it... fangirl rant?)

(_? I want to kill him... O.O Where did fangirls come in here?)_

(...oh. And didn't you know that everything written in books is real?)

(_WAH? YOU MEAN THAT ALIENS ARE GOING TO COME AND DESTROY THE WORLD? DX)_

(?)

(_War of the Worlds. DUH.)_

(...)

**How does it feel to control shadows or darkness?**

...it's like you're asking me how does it feel to breath... you don't feel anything!

_(Really? I'm always happy when I breathe because I'm alive...)_

(...I'm not even going to reply to that.)

(Aw...)

**How often do you hang out or bond with your younger brothers?**

Nil times a year. Apart from meetings where I'm invited.

**To Lady Artemis: ****What is it like to have a brother like Apollo?**

It's awful. I always wonder what I did to deserve it.

(_...Apollo's not THAT bad...)_

(How do you know?)

_(... at least I think so...)_

**To Lady Athena: How many books do you own?**

**Do you have a personal library? If so, may I take a look at your collection? I just adore the smell of Literature!**

**To Lady Aphrodite: Have you ever fallen in love or lust with a woman?**

...maybe I have... maybe I haven't...

_(I think that means yes...)_

**To Lady Hestia: It's a pleasure to see you included, miss "Mistress of the Hearth"! ****So, what is it like to be the eldest sibling?**

Dear The Lord of A Thousand Questions,

It's nice to be included for once too. Being the eldest sibling is hard. You have to watch your sibling fight, and, as in this case, since my siblings have more authority, I can't do anything to stop them. But... in a way it's nice too, cause you can see when your younger siblings need help or comfort, even if they won't tell you because they're too proud, and also, I seem to be the one that they all like, or at least don't mind having around. It's nice that way =)

_(*sniffs* That should be counted as emotional blackmail... it's so sad... I dislike the rest of the Olympians even more now...)_

(...Hestia just made me feel guilty...)

(_At least Posiedon admitted it...)_

(And me.)

(_HADES too? O.O)_

(...I suppose she made me...)

_(HOLD UP! HERA? WHO ARE YOU AND WHAT HAVE YOU DONE WITH HER?)_

(Sorry Hestia...)

(_Demeter... not unexpected...)_

(Well... I... suppose... it... maybe... no! Yes... NO!... fine. Yes.)

(_...Zeus did not.. he did... OMGs!)_

**To Lord Ares: WHAT WAS YOUR LEAST FAVORITE WAR, PUNK?**

YOU CALLING ME PUNK, PUNK?

_(You. Fail. Can you answer this as Mars? He's cooler than you.)_

ALL THE LEAST BLOODY WARS! I MEAN SERIOUSLY, HOW THE - _(LANGUAGE!) - _ARE YOU SUPPOSED TO HAVE WAR WITH MINIMUM BLOOD SPILT? SERIOUSLY! FIGHT MORE! DIE MORE! THOSE ARE THE MOST INTERESTING WARS TO WATCH!

**To Lady Persephone: What is it like living in the underworld for half of the year?**

Hell. Pun intended.

_(Ha ha. HA HA. Not.)_

(BURN!)

(_Ares. Shut it.)_

**To Lady Hecate: Is it possible for a demi-god who is not your child to learn your craft, or is it merely exclusive to your children?**

Dear demigods who are not my children... no. It's exclusive, only for children of amazing gods.

(_...I wish you luck on being a god for the next few years... Zeus looks pissed.)_

**To Lord Dionysus: Is it true that once you're inebriated, you can be a real party animal? :D**

HADES YES! ...especially if I have wine...

(No Dionysus.)

But -

(No.)

(_^_^ Burnt by your dad. You. Fail.)_

(That's my line! DX)

_(Ares.)_

**To Lord Zeus: Why do you and Poseidon dislike each other so much, anyway?**

Because he always tries to become the king of gods, he thinks he's better than me, he thinks the sea is better than the sky, he's annoying, he's useless, he's always going on about how Perseus is a better hero than any of my sons, he pretends to act like he's not jealous, even though I know he is, because he broke the oath, because he's immature and because he teases me. A lot of reasons.

**To Lady Hera: Is there a god or goddess of divorce? If so, do you often quarrel with that person?**

Fortunately, there is no god or goddess of divorce ^_^ So... no I don't quarrel with that person as he/she doesn't exist.

_(I CORRUPTED HERA INTO DOING SMILEY FACES!)_

**To Lord Hermes: What do you do for April Fool's Day?**

Unlimitedly prank every single god and demigod.

_(OOH! THAT'S A GOOD STORY IDEA! TELLMETELLMETELLME!)_

(No. I'll make my own account and write an AWESOME story on it. Awesomer than yours.)

(_...=( )_

**Dear Lady Athena and SIS (I agree your initials are awesome!) **

**Your answer was right and right now I'm kicking myself because I didn't think of that one, the answer I was thinking of was the they were father and son. **

**Another riddle; name the bell that is the colour of the sky and that's chime only the angels can hear.**

**This one is easier.**

**Glivan ( I feel really weird because Athena is my grandma yet she looks like she could be my older sister, how does that work?)**

Dear Glivan,

This is the author here. Unfortunately, my initials changed because I thought of a new pen name =/ Oh well.

Anyway, there's a problem. Athena's kind of... planning on how to kill someone at the moment. Yeah... and she's threatened to murder me if I try and ask her anything right now. Just my/your luck isn't it?

I don't know about Athena, but I can't figure out the answer to the riddle! DX I've heard it before, but I never got the answer... DX Tell me? I'll give you a cookie! Well a virtual one... but it's the thought that counts! ^_^

- The Chaos Creator

**Dear Lady Artemis**

**I know you hunting Apollo, and I wish you asked me to help find him because I know all the worlds hiding places, but on the pervert *grumbles* his crushes are non-existent because he is a perv but he does fear crocodiles and poisonous spiders but because of laws I couldn't import them, and his name is Teddy, ( though I call him pedo bear) hope it helps.**

**Glivan**

Dear Glivan,

Don't worry about it now. I managed to get my revenge. He can - unfortunately - still reply to messages, but he can't heal himself. =) Pedo bear? ...interesting name... =P

- Artemis

**Dear Hades, **

**If you ever need another Lieutenant, I'm your man, I can actually do stuff with all the dead plus I know were the doors of death are! And could I please borrow soul for a week, there are some peoplie I want to scar the bageebus out of?**

**Glivan**

Glivan,

I'm considering that offer... hm... and sure. Want one of a mass murderer? I need to punish a few, and it'd be a good punishment for them.

- Hades

(_...wait... is it me or is he saying spending time with you is punishment? ...that's just rude... =O)_

**Dear Hermes ( god of all things epic and cookies X^D)**

**Recently I said and laughed sadistically at my hungover older sister and then she got so angry she threatened me with a rusted spoon, a toaster and some yogurt, and I'm wondering if I could put duck tape on that list and make some pranks of of it, any suggestions?**

**Glivan**

Dear Glivan,

A wise man - me - once said, "You can make some pranks out of anything." And I agree with myself ;) What you do is - you don't actually need duct tape - you get some yoghurt and put it on the rusted spoon. You stick the spoon in the toaster - I don't know if the spoons you use are safe in the toaster, but ours are - and then 'start' the toaster. Someone comes in wanting toast, they'll try and put some bread in. It won't work. They'll frown and press the 'stop' button. The spoon covered in completely melted, sticky yoghurt comes out, flying in the air. Either they'll freeze or react. If they react, most people either move forward or back. Hopefully, they move forward and they get smacked by a very hot, sticky metal spoon. It's all fun and games until someone get's hurt... then it's plain hilarious. =) I haven't actually tried it, I just thought it up on the spot ;) Hopefully it works. =)

- Hermes

**Dear Posidon, **

**Zeus, is jealous of your domain because the sky is only a reflection of the sea and the sea can be so many colours it would make Iris proud and the sky is only two colours, blue and depression grey. Btw did yu know hades is planning to over take Zeus using his undead army, maybe you could help, and send and army of flying sharks, because you know you want to.**

**Glivan**

Dear Glivan,

All I can say is... STOP TEMPTING ME!

_(Can I help?)_

(Gods only.)

(_Who says I'm not a god?)_

(...)

- Posiedon

**Dear Aeolus, **

**I don't get why people call you mad, because mad people have well more fun. Plus you are one of the most powerful people, you have control of the winds and with out you of the winds the air would never be clean, right? I just wanted to say 'hi, dad' to ya.**

**Glivan**

Dear Glivan,

Mad? I'm not mad! I AM NOT MAD! See? Even Seraphine says I'm not mad. So =P to you.

And I know I'm powerful. But NOOOOOOOOOOOOO Zeus just HAS to keep me as KING of the winds not GOD of the winds. =.= Meanie.

Hi to you too. =)

- Aelous

**Dear Kronos**

**I have made a haiku worthy of Apollo so here it goes... **

**You are a loser**

**You can not beat the gods**

**Get over it dude**

**O.o**

**- Bonecollector**

No wonder it's a haiku worthy of Apollo. It's awful.

_(DUDE! STOP BEING MEAN! DX I like it ;) )_

(You have no taste.)

_(You're one to talk)_

(The second line had only 6 syllables.)

_(...I'm going to be nice and say no comment.)_

- Kronos

**Dear Apollo **

**What do you think of my haiku to Kronos?**

**- Bonecollector**

Bonecollector...

It. Was. AWESOME. =)

- Apollo

**Dear EvilWeirdo/SIS,**

**100 Reviews! Can we celebrate now?**

**:P**

**-Bell**

Dear Bell,

Hades yes. I give you all permission to sneak something from the pantry and if you're caught, blame it on me! =)

- The Chaos Creator

**Dear Zeus,**

**Does it feel bad being younger than your brothers?**

**-Bell**

Dear Bell,

Would you really like me to rant?

(_I had to hear the rant... my ears... ow...)_

If you do, ask me this again. If not...

_(Be thankful you haven't heard it... my poor, poor ears...)_

- Zeus

**Dear Lady Artemis,**

**My stepsister is a daughter of Hecate, she dislikes boys as much as you do but she does not want to join the hunt! She is kind of good in archery too! But she don't want to join the hunt because I am in the hunt too. She thinks I'm as annoying as all boys.**

**- 1st Hunter of Artemis**

Dear 1st Hunter of Artemis (really? O.O)

No huntress of mine can be as annoying as _any _of the boys. And it's her decision. If she doesn't want to join, she doesn't have to. I will not force anyone.

- Artemis

**Dear Artemis, **

**Not all guys are like that. Most guys aren't like that. I really don't like you. Guys have also been abused in their time, maybe not so much as women, but do you remember when they fought to protect their wives and family, when they it was one of the biggest crimes to harm a girl. That was enforced by men. Just something to think about. :) And I guess I should ask a question. Have you ever even felt any form of "love" (love referring to liking or wanting to be friendly) to any male, ever? **

- **Artemis**

_Hi, this is Chaos Creator. Artemis refuses to answer this so... I will!_

_SHE HAS! WITH ORION! She fell in love with him but then Apollo got pissed that his sister is in love so he tricked her into killing Orion. So she made him a constellation. Aw... such a sad love story... =(_

_- The Chaos Creator_

**Dear the most amazing Apollo, **

**Are you ok? They can't all be hunting you down! Does light ever hurt your eyes? You know, because you're the god of the son and all. **

**P.S. You are deserving of a thousand million more titles. **

- **Soozin Hevincarrr**

Dear Soozin,

They were =( And no. =)

_(Flattery gets you anywhere ;) =P)_

- Apollo

P.S. I agree, but they've made it so I can't put any titles in front of my name... =(

**Dear Aphrodite, **

**My sister is sixteen. So she's not like eleven. And I want to know what YOU think about this Pothena stuff. (It really disturbs me. Poseidon is Athena's uncle!)**

-** Soozin Hevincarrr**

Dear Soozin,

...oh. Time for me to do my work! And POTHENA IS SO CUTE! XD XD And gods don't have DNA so IT'S FINE! THEY NEED TO GET TOGETHER! ...but they refuse to... :'(

- Aphrodite

**Dear Hades, **

**How's yoga classes? You spoken with your counselor yet? Anyway... I wrote to ask: How does death feel? Because you've spoken with millions of dead souls, who have all passed from life into the hands of death. **

- **Soozin Hevincarrr**

I do not go to yoga. I do not talk with counsellors. And dead souls don't like talking about death so... I don't know.

- Hades

**Dear Zeus, **

**Sometimes I think you and Hades should do yoga to get over your anger issues. What do you think? (Brotherly bonding time! :D) **

- **Soozin Hevincarrr**

Dear Soozin,

No. Just... no.

- Zeus

**Dear Pan, **

**Will you answer me? Just testing Ouranus's theory.**

- **Soozin Hevincarrr**

...

**Dear Hera, **

**I'm curious. Do you realise that the prophecy of the seven says "seven half-bloods will take the call" which does not mean "the seven Hera chooses will save the world"? Is it possible that your chosen seven may not be the seven to succeed? What if someone is killed or taken and the seven becomes six?**

- **Soozin Hevincarrr**

Dear Soozin,

Do you realize the Fates may have intended for me to choose the seven? And the Fates have everything planned out, I can't change it. What I think is what the Fates planned out.

- Hera

**Dear Atlas, **

**Is that sky heavy? I just thought I should thank you, for doing a wonderful job at keeping us from being crushed. Thank you! Without you, Prometheus would probably have really sore arms. **

- **Soozin Hevincarrr**

Dear Soozin,

Atlas told me what he wanted to say - be thankful you weren't there my innocence of non-colourful language has left me DX

So... summed up... yes. It is.

- The Chaos Creator/Atlas

**Dear Sanity is Surreal, **

**Does this new demigods included thing mean we can ask satyrs and the few metioned dryads, naiads and auras as well?**

**- Soozin Hevincarrr**

Dear Soozin,

Yup =)

But... not for a while... because...

a) I will not be updating this story for about... 2-6 weeks! DON'T KILL ME! We're moving overseas so I won't have much wifi and stuff... and then school will start... and my other stories... I'm sorry... =(

- The Chaos Creator

P.S. KEEP ASKING QUESTIONS THOUGH!

P.P.S. Sorry for long time no update DX

P.P.P.S. I have put a limit on questions one person can ask in one chapter... I'm sorry but otherwise there's too much of an overload of questions... 4 questions. I'm sorry guys! But if... well around 25 people asked questions in the last chapter. Even 25 people asking three questions is 75 questions. 25 people asking 4 is one hundred. And the amount of questions I got asked last chapter - and remember I didn't answer every single one of them this time (Sorry DX) is... well I don't know exactly but definitely over a hundred... and that just makes it longer to update... and also, the questions asking every single Olympian... *groans* I'm gonna die...

**Dear Athena,**

**Hi! Another Riddle for you from me!**

**As I was going to St. Ives, I saw a man with seven wives, each wife had seven bags, each bag had seven cats each cat had seven kittens, how many were going to St. Ives? (You can use calculator)**

**-IWM (You can also call me Alice)**

Dear Alice,

That is a trick question =P

There are many possible answers, but no one has confirmed which is true.

One answer could be, 1 person, because it only says the narrator is going to St. Ives, but does not state if the man and his wives and cats and kittens are going too.

Personally, I think this is the most correct answer, as that is the best answer according to the question.

- Athena

**Dear Hestia, **

**Why do you like the hearth?**

**-pErCaBeThFaN-**

Dear -pErCaBeThFaN-,

Because it's so calm and peaceful. You can distract yourself from other's arguing.

- Hestia

**Dear Dionysus, **

**Since you're the god of partying... What are the best educational prizes in a party and how do you plan a party?**

**-pErCaBeThFaN-**

Dear -pErCaBeThFaN-,

Educational prizes? Why would you have educational prizes in a party? O.o And you don't plan. YOU JUST DO! XD

- Dionysus

**Dear Kronos, **

**Why do you hate mortals?**

**-pErCaBeThFaN-**

Because they are annoying and insufferable idiots, full stop, end of story.

- Kronos

**Dear Zeus,**

**How do you avoid Hera?**

**-pErCaBeThFaN-**

Dear -pErCaBeThFaN-,

I can't... =(

- Zeus

**Dear Dirt-Filled Pothole (a.k.a. Gaea)**

**Does it bother you that you are sometimes depicted as a singing, sweet maiden whose laundry is done by animals and one day is carried off by a prince and lived happily ever after and then there's this weird, cheesy 'The End'? Also, is Demeter your arch-enemy or something because she controlled your 'precious' wheat monster/Cupid hybrids?**

**Dorky Porky**

Dorky Porky,

Yes. Yes it does. I DO NOT SING! I AM NOT SWEET! I AM NOT A MAIDEN! I DON'T EVEN LIKE SQUIRRELS AND OTHER 'CUTE' ANIMALS! AND WHY IS THERE A STUPID PRINCE? I AM EVIL! I DO NOT NEED A PRINCE! AND WHY IS IT SO CHEESY? I. AM. NOT. CHEESY.

Just had to rant.

And... ... ... no. They're idiots. I have no need for them.

- GAEA (not Dirt-Filled Pothole)

**Dear Awesomer, All-Powerful Lord Poseidon,**

**Oh. I was asking how Zeus and Hades reacted when they saw (IF they ever knew) that you are really the most powerful of the Three. **

**And thank you for blessing me! Don't tell Zeus or Hades this, but my I ask why I have green eyes and black hair? I'm pretty sure you only have Percy but um...**

**Also, I just wanted you to know that you are FREAKING awesome! XD**

**Till next chappie,**

**Blessed Girl of the Sea**

**P. S. Also (leans down and whispers) why don't I have a father!**

**P. P. S. I changed my name from Girl of the Pool! **

Dear Blessed Girl of the Sea,

SH! ARE YOU TRYING TO GET ME KILLED - even though it's impossible - STOP SAYING THAT STUFF I'M ABOUT TO -

_Dear Blessed Girl of the Sea... unfortunately, Posiedon just got fried to crisp by Zeus' Master Bolt - don't ask how - and... he's dead for a while_

_Maybe he'll be back in a week or something... I dunno. Meh._

_- The Chaos Creator_

**Dear Percy Jackson,**

**You. Ar****e. Incredibly. FREAKING. Cool. **

**Coolio Swimmer**

Dear Coolio Swimmer,

Thanks =)

- Percy Jackson

**Dear Selene,**

**Can you reply? Just wanted to let you know that you're awesome. You're not forgotten, ok? In fact one of my OC's is named Selene- who is you as a demigod! And who is one of the Heroes of Olympus. **

**-Lunar Girl**

Dear Lunar Girl,

Aw... so sweet of you =)

- Selene

**ARES - Whoa. I just got the God of Maiming and Bloodshed, to call ME a jerk. I will take that as a compliment. My question is, if you're dating the goddess of beauty, why do you even want to make it with mortal chicks? We (meaning mortal girls in general), sexy as we are, probably can't compete with Aphrodite in the looks department- and knowing you, it's not cuz of their great personalities. Not that uour sex life is any of my damn buisness, but I don't really have awkwardness sensors, so I dont give a flyin turd.**

**Punk and Proud Of It**

_(...O.O)_

Punk...

Dude(ette), I don't really want to discuss my se - _(LOVE - for younger viewers)_ life with YOU, so PISS OFF.

_(...someone's in a bad mood... did someone wake up on the wrong side of bed this morning? Aw...)_

(Go to Hades)

(_Been there, done that (to get answers for questions... and because Hades is cooler. MORE. THAN. YOU.)_

Ares

**ALL GODS AND DEMIGODS: What's your theme song? Teenagers by My Chemical Romance should be Camp Half-Blood's collective theme song, but that's really up to Chiron. (oh and this is entirely unrelated in any way, but my real penname is Amaya Sakaruta. I'm not using it because my first question was to Ares so I made my name be 'punk and Proud of it' to screw with him, and i didnt wanna change it...)**

**- Punk and Proud Of It**

_OOH! I BAGS ANSWERING THIS QUESTION! I DON'T CARE WHAT THEY SAY! I ANSWER FOR ALL OF THEM XD XD XD_

_So..._

_Zeus - Womanizer. Hera agrees._

_Hera - Um... she doesn't know and I don't know either... but I know a song dedicated to her! Shut Up by Simple Plan - (the awesomest ones XD)!_

_Posiedon - Under the Sea (Don't ask, long story)_

_Hestia - Missing... or Tied Together With A Smile (Other gods requested these... no names)_

_Hades - Boulevard of Broken Dreams (AWESOME SONG... for an awesome god XD (Flattery can get you anywhere))_

_D__emeter - ...uh... um... a cereal ad?_

_Athena - Stupid Girls_

_Artemis - Run the World (Girls)_

_Aphrodite - Don't Cha_

__Hephaestus - Born This Way__

__Apollo - Runaway Baby (Ek... he pushed me to do that or... or a certain song by LFMAO, which I refuse to put for him)__

_Hermes - Mail Man_

_Dionysus - Party Rock Anthem_

_Ares - Riot_

_Percy - I'm Just a Kid_

_Annabeth - American Idiot_

_Thalia - Fighter_

_Nico - God Must Hate Me (Correction - THE GodS Must Hate Me)_

_- The Chaos Creator ^^_

**ZEUS- DUDE. There has been like NO snow in my stupid town for the ENTIRE FREAKING WINTER WTF? It's nine days from Christmas and I CAN STILL SEE THE GROUND! UNACCEPTABLE! We can't afford chestnuts, and my mom doesn't like me within a mile of an open fire, and now your just gonna take away the only christmasy thing i have left! U suck! please mae it snowww...**

**- Punk and Proud Of It Amaya Sakaruta**

PaPOIAS,

...well Christmas is over...

_(Sorry... DX)_

And since you said I suck, I'll make sure it doesn't snow again for a long time.

(...bad luck... DX Stupid Zeus...)

- Zeus

**ATHENA, APHRODITE, AND ARTEMIS- Okay, this is random, but did you ever watch Charlie's Angels? Because it's one of my favorite movies, and lately when I watch it, I think of the smart raven haired chick as Athena, the blonde one as Aphrodote, and the badass redhead as Artemis. Any thoughts...?**

**- Punk and Proud Of It Amaya Sakaruta**

Dear PaPOIAS...

Athena - I suppose...

Aphrodite - LOL XD XD

Artemis - ..bleh. Never seen it. Who needs movies when you have hunting?

**Dear Poseidon,**

**Do you eat sea food?**

**And can I be your daughter?**

**And can you teach me how to swim?**

**Love Panda24**

Deat Panda24,

No I don't... =) PROTECT THE SEA ANIMALS!

Um... you can't just ask to be... it's either yes you are at birth, or no you're not.

...um... uh oh, look there's Delphin! Damn it... maybe later? Or you could go to a swimming pool and instructors there could help? But none can teach better than me =)

- Posiedn

**Dear Ares,**

**Can you teach me how to shoot?**

**Love Panda24**

Panda24,

...no. Because... just because.

- Ares

**Dear Poseidon,**

**What do you think about the fanfics in which your son, Percy, is a girl and then goes out with Hermes, Apollo and Ares?**

**Love Panda24**

Dear Panda24,

They. Are. REVOLTING. =.=

- Posiedon

**Dear Hermes, Apollo and Ares**

**What do you think about the fanfics in which Percy is a girl and goes out with you all?**

**Love Panda24**

Dear Panda24,

Hermes - NOT. GOING. TO. HAPPEN. ANY. TIME. SOON... bleh... I need to go wash my eyes from the mental image...

_(Ew...)_

Apollo - Ew... who'd want to go out with him/her?

_(You've made me doubt Percy's gender... and agreed! ...well apart from Annabeth but currently she's delusional XD)_

Ares - ... =.=

_(Don't worry mate. That says it all. It says everything...)_

- Hermes, Apollo and Ares

**Dear Hades,**

**If Persephone fell in love with a mortal man, and he died, and her final wish was to for you to let her go and die/fade away with him, would you grant it?**

**-Bell**

Dear Bell,

NO. That's my final answer... DEFINITELY NO.

- Hades

**Dear Demigods,**

**If you were given a chance to be a god/goddess, what domain would you chose?**

**-pErCaBeThFaN-**

Dear -pErCaBeThFaN-

Percy: THE SEA!

(_That's already taken)_

Fine. Rivers. Or loyalty...

Annabeth: Architecture ^^

_(Typical)_

Clarisse: WEAPONS!

_(Again, typical.)_

Connor and Travis: WE'D SHARE PRANKS! WE'D OWN UP!

_(...? I don't understand the last part...)_

(Never mind...)

Thalia: ...hm... lightning... =)

Nico: Um... I don't know.

_(Stupidity?)_

(Ha ha. Not.)

Um... chocolate.

_(...chocolate?)_

(Chocolate.)

_(...you have good taste my friend ^^ Pun unintended.)_

Who else do you want to answer?

- Some demigods

**Dear Awesomer, All Powerful Lord Poseidon,**

**Ikr? Look the word 'awesome' up in the dictionary and it says 'Poseidon. No more no less.' That would also be awesome. XD XD XD**

**Girl of the Pool**

Dear Girl of the Pool,

I am going to write a mini dictionary (not in alphabetical order though)!

Definition of boring: Athena.

Definition of idiot: Zeus.

Definition of odd: Hades.

Definition of obsessive: Demeter.

Definition of friendly: Hestia.

Definition of cow: Hera.

Definition of insane: Apollo.

Definition of busy: Hermes

Definition of stupid: Ares

Definition of blonde: Aphrodite

Definition of mean: Dionysus

Definition of ugly: Hephaestus (No offense!)

Definition of tomboy: Artemis

Definition of retard: Kronos

Definition of brat: Oceanus

Definition of awesome: ...I think we all know who it is =)

- Posiedon

**Dear All the Gods,**

**Please claim me! I will say this truthfully: I have green eyes and black hair, have a pretty sarcastic and good sense of humor, and I'm almost as tall as my dad and I'm ELEVEN. I'm the only girl in the WHOLE FREAKING CLASS that can actually do fifteen sit upsnin a row without breaking my neck, and I'm like a barracuda in the water. I love writing and reading, but really want nothing to do with riddles. I like apps like The Impossible Test and can take apart a blink pen, take out all eight pens, replace the spring, take apart the cap and put it together again, and make it as good as new in less than two minutes. I'm really loyal and you can ALWAYS trust me, and I'm a really good lier. I run faster than anybody else in my class, do pretty well at hurdles, but I really am not the person for pranks. Any more info? I think that was too much :P**

**Curious**

Dear Curious,

Since I know we did not all go screw each other (Awkward...), there can't be a kid with all of our powers. And anyway, that'd make you a godling. So I'm sorry to disappoint you but I think you're a mortal.

But don't worry, its good to be a talented mortal! You'll never get the chance to be monster lunch... and trust me, that's a lot of fun.

Sincerely,

Zeus on behalf of all the Gods

P.S. Posiedon almost got killed by his wife even though it's impossible. ^^ =)

**Dear Hestia,**

**The hearth is awesome! Do you ever toast marshmallows on it?**

**Tender of the flames, Jr. (and marshmallow monster)**

Dear Tender of the flames, Jr,

Ha ha ha =) I have to agree with you there.

And... to admit it... yes. I do. Ah... nothing better than peace and toasted marshmallows...

- Hestia

**Dear The Gods,**

**This is really REALLY random but what's your favorite flavor of ice cream and who invented it?**

**Mine personally are Dibs. DIBS FTW!**

**- Girl of the Pool**

Dear Girl of the Pool,

This is Poseidon answering your question as Zeus thinks... well, I'll just quote him. "A question that random can only be asked by a blithering idiot, which generally means its your kid." I know he thinks you're my kid just because you have the world 'Pool' in your name. For the love of gods, all things water aren't related to me! Or maybe they are since - nevermind, I'll debate with myself later. Oh and, don't get offended by what my brother said, he's just PMSing.

To answer your question, my favourite flavour is chocolate chip. Don't ask me about everyone, it'll take too long to go into the specifics. The Health Conscious gods (*cough* Demeter *cough*) don't eat ice cream, the cool gods (me, Hermes, Apollo and such) like chocolaty stuff, Aphrodite obviously likes Strawberry and all the boring/old gods (Athena, Zeus...) like Vanilla.

I think that covers it.

- Poseidon.

**Dear Kronos:**

**What about LORD Voldemort?**

**~WeasleyAtHeart**

WeasleyAtHeart,

What about LORD KRONOS? That's the BEST idea! You've gotten so much closer from the beginning.

_(Lame.)_

- Kronos

P.S. Your author will die soon.

_(Tell it to someone who cares. You just got burned by a 13 year old! OUCH.)_

**Dear Kronos, Lord of Time**

**You really are horrible at manipulating people, hell worse than Voldemort, really why do you say they are going to die, why would you even tell them they are pathetic and useless? Honestly, all you can get a few forgotten kids by manipulating them, really, that is pathetic. And Ares? Impressive .*sarcasm***

**But honestly, also instead of just having a spy in the camp just telling you what they've been planning, why don't you make them like kill somebody once in a while? It would scare the hell of people and make them suspicious of each other and thus throw camp into chaos. But noooo you are all like: ****"Nah just tell me what their gonna do"**

**Oh, and have you thought instead of fighting two fronts (Greeks and Romans) you should have just concentrated everything on one side, then finish with the other. You like repeated World War 2 **

**But anyway, you need more respect by people here, well, unless you know, keep doing moronic mistakes.**

**- Ianian58**

To the coward who didn't even leave a name,

I think your question is what people call a 'flame' on FanFiction. Anyway.

What is it with people and Voldemort! That flat nosed green faced moron is dead! Shut up about him!

Well Mr. Loser Coward, here's the difference between you and me. Whatever my tactics may be, I'm cooler.

Ruled the world? Check.

Scared the ** out of the gods more than once? Check.

Have an army at my disposal? Check.

Am feared by people? Check.

So there! I am awesome!

I'm not going to bother answering all your scornful questions, they make me laugh. You don't have a brain clever enough to see the big picture. If my spies killed someone it'd be _obvious _that there's an impostor. And you think an Aphrodite kid can actually murder someone? *scornful*

If I concentrated on one front, the other personality of the gods would awaken and defend themselves and I'd never be able to win. So I had to attack both sides together.

There there, kid. Don't feel so bad. Obviously, my intelligence is worthy of Athena herself. And you're just a cowardly mortal who can't even spell.

- Kronos

PS: I know where you live. I know where you sleep. I know when you do what and how. There's a surprise awaiting you *cue evil laugh*

- Kronos

_Dear Ianian58 and Kronos (By the way Kronos, you're going deaf. I specifically told you that it was by Ianian58 but NOOOOOOOOOO you just HAVE to fume over what he said instead of listening to ME),_

_Ianian58: DUDE YOU RULE! XD =) =) =) HE WAS LIKE... speechless! But no, I'm not going to bow to you because _I _am the evillest person that will take over the world. =.= If you want to try and become the evillest, then you have to go through me. Anyway, I will go through your points and analyse them... =)_

**You really are horrible at manipulating people, hell worse than Voldemort, really why do you say they are going to die, why would you even tell them they are pathetic and useless? **

_I know! So true!_

**Honestly, all you can get a few forgotten kids by manipulating them, really, that is pathetic. And Ares? Impressive .*sarcasm***

_YOU READ MY MIND!_

**But honestly, also instead of just having a spy in the camp just telling you what they've been planning, why don't you make them like kill somebody once in a while? It would scare the hell of people and make them suspicious of each other and thus throw camp into chaos. But noooo you are all like: "Nah just tell me what they're gonna do"**

_Hm... what I would have done is kill someone, then just drop all activity. Do nothing even mildly suspicious. Then two years later, BOOM! A major event that throws everyone off track and gets the gods to leave Olympus. Then, you take over some dude - in this case Luke (RIP) - and go up to Olympus while the gods aren't there and destroy the throne room and the seats of power. Simple. I mean, it's so busy at Olympus that you'll be able to be avoid being seen, and when you've done that and taken over, you can destroy the rest of Olympus! SIMPLE! FAIL PROOF! SO HOW DID I THINK OF IT WHEREAS YOU CAN'T? IDIOT! (This is to Kronos by the way)_

**Oh, and have you thought instead of fighting two fronts (Greeks and Romans) you should have just concentrated everything on one side, then finish with the other. You like repeated World War 2.**

_Well... I think the Romans just realized something was happening and joined in... jerks. (I don't like Romans apart from Frank and Hazel. Romans are jerks.)_

**But anyway, you need more respect by people here, well, unless you know, keep doing moronic mistakes.**

_Doubt that's ever going to stop =)_

_Kronos: ...yeah just read what I wrote above (The plan) And... dude you suck at making threats. Go jump in a hole (preferably Tartarus)_

_- The Chaos Creator_

**To: Lady Artemis** **My friend, who is, er, to be blunt, gay, is taking a liking to the Hunter's lifestyle. Is it possible for him to join?** **Oh, and are missiles, rifles, muskets and nukes in your artillery?** **Signed, TrollKastell**

Dear TrollKastell

Even if he is gay, I will not allow a boy to join my Hunters. But I may make an exception for him to come hunting with us once or twice as he seems to appreciate our lifestyle.

As for your second question, who'd have those? They're outdated. You'd freak out at the current equipment never known to man or god.

Shut up, Ares, so what? Athena is the goddess of wisdom _and _battle, we worked on those together. These babies will only be known to women!

Girl power FTW!

- Artemis

**Dear Olympians,**

**1. Have you ever had the feeling you were being watched?**

**2. What makes the red-man red?**

**3. In an episode of Spongebob Squarepants, Spongebob was choking and asked for a glass of water. Why did he ask for one if he clearly lives in the ocean?**

**4. If I ate the Milky Way, would it taste like a Milky Way candy bar?**

**5. With the constant evolution of Apple technology, will their devices one day became sentient and force us to play music for them?**

**6. I have a problem; I find myself simply invited to far too many lingerie model pillow fights and they are beginning to become dull. How would you advise me in improving this situation?**

**7. Who is "she" in the phrase, "that's what she said?" **

**- Answer that Crazy Guy**

**P.S. Thank you for answering my stupid questions! :D**

To this moron, _(Ooh... harsh... someone's crabby.)_

*facepalm* Poseidon, this seems to be another of your children. Can't you just keep your pants on? Aphrodite says she'll answer these questions. Over to her._ (...no comment...)_

Hey, Aphrodite here! Have I ever felt like I'm being watched? No duh! All eyes are on me whenever I enter a place, babe ;) _(Bleh. Show off.)_

What makes the red man red? A woman's seductive touch. It makes him blush. If you want to know how they blush, ask Athena. _(...woah that's just... eh... never mind...)_

It's because he's stupid. _(OI! SPONGEBOB IS COOL!)_

That's an interesting question, hon! Why don't you try that and then tell me? _(*rolls eyes* You can't eat the Milky Way, Einstein.)_

Apollo's perked up at that question. He's made a haiku about it.

Men make devices,

iPods won't make us sing cause,

I will be banning them.

_(My... brain... it... hurts... such... a bad... haiku...)_

Apollo wants to answer the next one too.

Hey, Apollo here. *grins* Next time you have a lingerie models pillow fight, call me, babe. I'll spice it up ;) No, Heph, I don't need a chastity belt. Its okay. _(...you know kids read this?)_

I can't be bothered answering the last one and don't ask Athena, she'll go into the details of it. Just forget it. _(I agree...)_

- Zeus, Aphrodite and Apollo

**Lord Hades, **

**Why aren't you king of the gods? You're Kronos' oldest son. Doesn't that mean you have a birthright to rule over all the gods?**

**- Fenrir the Vicious**

Do you want the short answer or the long rant?

Short answer: Because Zeus is a unfair, stuck-up git with no brain. _(Ha ha! AGREED!)_

Long rant: I SHOULD BE KING OF THE GODS BUT NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO! ZEUS DECIDES TO BE KING OF THE GODS JUST BECAUSE HE FREED US FROM KRONOS' STOMACH _(Ew...) _BUT REALLY, IS IT OUR FAULT THAT OUR FATHER IS A CANNIBALISTIC IDIOT OR THAT OUR MOTHER, _FINALLY, _DECIDED TO TAKE ACTION ONLY WHEN SHE HAD HER LAST KID? NO! IT ISN'T! AND THEN HE FORCES ME TO GO DOWN TO THE UNDERWORLD AND MAKES SURE I'M NOT ALLOWED IN OLYMPUS! AS MUCH AS I SAY I AM NOT OLYMPIAN, I REALLY AM, AND IS SHOULD BE ALLOWED ON OLYMPUS! GO TO TARTARUS ZEUS!

- Hades

_(Good... good... you're progressing. Excellent counselling technique Fenrir.)_

(Shut it.)

_(Touchy.)_

**Ares,**

** I heard that Apollo once beat you in boxing match. Did you lose because you did have a weapon? I bet Lord Mars wouldve won.**

**- Fenrir the Vicious**

Fenrir the _Vicious _(note the sarcasm),

WHAT IDIOT SAID THAT? THAT'S NOT _-beep-_ING TRUE! HOW WOULD THAT IDIOT BEAT ME? IT'S IMPOSSIBLE! HE'S A COMPLETE WIMP! I. DID. NOT. LOSE! GO TO -_beep_-ING HADES!

- Ares

**To all Olympians:**

**When you came to america did you fight any of the Native American, Aztec, Incan or Mayan gods**

**- Fenrir the Vicious**

Dear Fenrir the Vicious,

Nope. They were too scared of us ;)

Ares says - and I quote this, "GREEK GODS CAN NOT BE DEFEATED CAUSE WE'RE TOO AWESOME... apart from Hephaestus."

_(Well Ares is an imbecile so you shouldn't listen to him. Greek demigods are better than Roman but Roman gods are better than Greek =) )_

(EXCUSE ME?)

(He he... I'm gonna go hide in a hole...)

Zeus on behalf of the Olympians

**Dear Athena,**

**I am really sorry about this, but-**

**Ahaha! So, Lady Athena, let me intruduce myself! I am Erika, Trollkastell's great cousin! I am here writing to you because I wish to know if my logic abilities. are at par with yours! Mwahahaha! Oh, and if I win, give me cookies.**

**-yep. That's my cousin. anyway Lady Athena, could you please let her? Annoying cousins are annoying.**

**P.S. Dont shoot at meh.**

**-TrollKastell**

Dear TrollKastell

I never decline a challenge. It. Is. ON.

BRING IT! =)

_(YAY! I BAGS REPORTER THAT GETS TO LAUGH AT WHOEVER LOSES!)_

- Athena

**To Hera,**

**You can't have any kids with other people beside Zeus right? Then seeing the other gods having half blood kids, do you ever feel jealous?**

**-JustAnotherRandomKid**

Dear JustAnotherRandomKid,

Of course I don't get jealous! Why would I? *grumble grumble grumble* _(Mhm. I believe you. Definitely.)_

Demigods are useless and unneeded... unless they're for a prophecy. _(I feel so loved.)_

- Hera

**To Poseidon,**

**What about Sally? What do you think about her? Do you sometimes wish that you can be with her again?**

**-JustAnotherRandomKid**

**P.S: Please don't zap me into million pieces for my question.**

Dear JustAnotherRandomKid,

I won't zap you but really, do you want my wife to do the impossible and murder me?

DAMN! Amphitrite's coming. I'll quickly answer your questions.

Yes and YES.

Now shoo before she gets here! _(Jeez, I'm going... calm down... paranoid much?)_

- Posiedon

**To Apollo,**

**You still owe me a limerick! :p Anyway, is it awesome to ride a sun chariot? Is the chariot hot?**

**-JustAnotherRandomKid**

Dear JustAnotherRandomKid,

Limericks are old

Haikus are the new fashion

I am amazing

_(...my... head...)_

Yes it is awesome

Course the chariot is hot

But I am more hot

_(...BLEH.)_

- Apollo

**To Ares,**

**Well, bombs are a little bit creepy, but I have to say, I do like it XP anyway, do you like guns? Or do you still like swords better?**

**-JustAnotherRandomKid**

JustAnotherRandomKid,

Hm... I think I might like swords more... sure guns can be long-ranged and it's easier to kill people, but swords allow you to make fun of your enemy and SLOWLY kill them.

- Ares

**To Athena,**

**I'm having a trouble with learning physics. Do you have any suggestion to help me with it?**

**-JustAnotherRandomKid**

Dear JustAnotherRandomKid,

Well, the only suggestion I have is keep studying hard. When you read it... don't just read it. Think about it. Try and completely understand it. And if you can't, ask your teacher. There's no harm in it. They might be able to explain it in a simpler, easier way.

- Athena

**To Artemis,**

**If you hate men, do you hate male heroes then (Jason, Perseus, Theseus, etc.)? **

**-JustAnotherRandomKid**

Dear JustAnotherRandomKid,

I don't... _hate _them, but I still despise them. Especially Theseus. Do you know how he treated Ariadne? He left her on an island. Alone. Heart broken. So he's the only male hero that I actually hate.

- Artemis

**To Hermes,**

**Aaaaw, why do you like to annoy me? D:**

**Anyway, how's George and Martha? Do they still argue? Have you ever get migraine hearing them arguing (wait, can a god have migraine?)?**

**-JustAnotherRandomKid**

Dear JustAnotherRandomKid,

Annoying people is fun ;) Just ask the author ;) _(*grumbling* Stupid... idiot... not letting me update the story...)_

They're fine. They still argue... =.= How many times have I gotten a migraine... at least a billion... =/ It shouldn't be possible but unforunately they argue so much that I do get one. =/

- Hermes

**To Kronos,**

**Fine, then answer this question: How does it feels for you,The Oh So Mighty *cough* Lord of the time and King of Titans, to get PWND by Percy? **

**-JustAnotherRandomKid**

...remember, I can immediately find out where you live and can come find you and kill you. =.=

- Kronos

**To Travis and Katie,**

**Are you dating? :p**

**-JustAnotherRandomKid**

Dear JustAnotherRandomKid,

Travis: ...I wish...

Katie: NO. I WILL NEVER DATE TRAVIS STOLL!

_(Aw... young love...)_

- Travis and Katie

**To Annbeth,**

**Have you ever beat Percy in Sword fighting?**

**- JustAnotherRandomKid**

Dear JustAnotherRandomKid,

Of course I have! Heaps! But not since when took a dip in the River Styx. =.= Damn it... stupid Nico and his stupid ideas... but now that the curse of Achilles has gone... yes. I have ^^

- Annabeth

**Dear the Olympians and mostly Apollo,**

**Ok I've got to tell you something weird. We were eating out, and there was a light hanging in front if us, right? Typical. But then here's the strange part- I stared at is, and the light dimmed. I felt a tiny bit drowsy, and I thought it was just my eyes- but my vision was the same. I stared at it again, felt double the times more drowsy, but the light had increased it's brightness to what it was before. My fingers tingled a bit, and afterwards I rushed home to write this to you. Lord Apollo, am I your child?**

**- Lightnin' Girl**

Dear Lightnin' Girl,

This is Zeus on everyone's behalf.

We all say, "We wouldn't be surprised if you were. Apollo can't keep it in his pants."

OI! Apollo here. EVERYONE! STOP MAKING FUN OF ME! ...I can't help it if I'm incredibly hot...

But... you probably are though... =)

See you kiddo!

- Zeus and Apollo

**Dear Artemis**

**Do you punish Hunters who broke their vow to never fall in love with a boy?**

**Also, is a Huntress/Huntress relationship alright with you?**

**Just curious...**

**-ShadowTraveler08**

Dear ShadowTraveler08,

Yes... I tend to... sometimes... depending on my mood. But usually, yes.

And... I suppose it's okay... even though it would be a bit disturbing... I mean... never mind. I'm not going to go into any details of anything.

- Artemis

**Dear Kronos,**

**I am slowly but surely collecting your ashes and pieces in a big old case. I am helping you to rule the world. Where would you like me to give you your ashes?**

**-When It All Crashes Down**

**P.S. I hope everything crashes down... heh heh heh heh**

When It All Crashes Down,

Er... Mount Othrys would be a good idea. And... good on you for helping a helper for the TRUE ruler of the world.

- Kronos

P.S. I can tell by your name/pen name.

**Dear Artemis,**

**Y U SO MEAN TO BOYS! ME NO BOY BUT GURL!**

**-When It All Crashes Down**

Dear When It All Crashes Down,

Urgh... haven't I explained it enough times? I. JUST. DO. GET. OVER. IT.

- Artemis

Dear When It All Crashes Down,

Apollo here.

Uh... you might want to watch out... Artemis is starting to get pissed at people...

Just a warning.

- Apollo ;)

**Dear Athena,**

**Did you accidentally curse Stephanie Meyer with a curse? If so can you reverse it, I keep hearing about sparkling vampires. It rather annoys me.**

**-When It All Crashes Down**

Dear When It All Crashes Down,

I didn't curse her... but I think I will... urgh... why did she have to get that dream... too... sappy... and sparkly vampires called Edward Cullen? REALLY? URGH...

- Athena

**Dear Hestia, the most Amazing and Kind,**

**I love you! You're my favorite goddess!**

**-When It All Crashes Down**

Dear When It All Crashes Down,

Why thank you =) Nice to know I'm appreciated. =)

- Hestia

**Dear Hades,**

**Do you ever feel like you are misjudged and misunderstood?**

**-When It All Crashes Down**

****Dear When It All Crashes Down,

Of course not! It's not like my brothers are idiots and have banned me from what should be my home as well, and it's not like I'm hated by pretty much everyone and have never been helped by my family in my life or that I'm not even considered an Olympian. And OF COURSE I haven't been misjudged as a evil, ruthless (okay maybe I'm ruthless) god that cares only for himself... *sarcasm*

_(And there's more then just that... reason uno why I despise some of the Olympians. *cough Zeus and Hera cough*_

- Hades

**Dear Apollo,**

**I don't like you or your sorry butt! HAHAHAHAHAHAHA, just kidding... you're just okay.**

**-When It All Crashes Down**

**P.S. Artemis is better than you by miles**

****Dear When It All Crashes Down,

_You are really mean_

_I am cooler than Arty_

_She has brainwashed you_

I think that explains everything

- Apollo

**Dear Hecate,**

**You have freaking magic. Did you birth Harry Potter?**

**-When It All Crashes Down**

****Dear When It All Crashes Down,

DO I LOOK LIKE I HAVE RED HAIR AND GREEN EYES AND WOULD GO OUT WITH THE IDIOT CALLED JAMES POTTER? DO I? DO I?

...calm...

Sorry, but how many gods have asked that, I've lost count... gr...

So anyway... no. I'm not Lily Potter and I didn't pretend to be her to get some git to fall in love with me.

How are wizards made then? ...not telling ;)

- Hecate

* * *

><p><strong>IMPORTANT AUTHOR'S NOTE! READ IT!<strong>

**Firstly... sorry no update for ages... and I have two pieces of good news =) and some bad news DX**

**WHOOP WHOOP WHOOP WHOOP WHOOP WHOOP WHOOP WHOOP WHOOP WHOOP WHOOP WHOOP! XD XD XD XD**

**OVER 100 REVIEWS! XD XD XD THANK YOU TO ALL MY BRILLIANT AWESOME REVIEWERS! I LOVE YOU! I GIVE YOU ALL PERMISSION TO HAVE CAKE! AND LOTS OF IT! XD **

**Sorry, on high from that... I'm just so happy that in 7 chapters I got 130 reviews... =) Let's see if we can get to 200 then 300 then 400 then 500, etc, etc... but you have to run out of questions eventually so... =/**

**Second good news: OVER 13,000 words for ONLY THIS CHAPTER! WHOOP WHOOP!**

**Anyway, once again sorry for long time no update, I know you want to kill me =( but, I have plenty of reasons.**

**Holidays=mum dragging me out of the house/lazy/forum HEAPS**

**Other stories=NEED TO BE UPDATED**

**More than 100 reviews=over-whelmed**

**Being more than 12 people=over-whelmed/head hurts= more breaks in writing**

**THANKS TO: I (dot) Tripped (dot) Over (dot) Reality for helping me answer some of the questions! The Dire wolf and I-can't-be-Perfect-Sorry for helping me with some of the songs.**

**For the bad news... check my reply to Soozin Hevincarrr at the question she asked me.**

**- The Chaos Creator**

**P.S. Yup, I changed my pen name... again XD**


	9. Chapter 9

**Disclaimer: I don't own Percy Jackson and the Olympians or Greek Mythology.**

* * *

><p><strong>Dear Hades and Zeus,<strong>

**How does it feel to know that Poseidon is so much cooler than you?**

**april-babe16**

Dear april-babe16,

Zeus - Posiedon is not cooler than us - well greater than me at least. I don't know or care about Hades. And why do you mortals rate everything on coolness? What about on more powerful? Everyone knows I am most powerful. And really? How is Posiedon cooler than us in any shape or form anyway?

Hades - Eh. I don't really care what you mortals say. It's not as if it'll change any actions of the Olympians. They'll just keep on arguing, excluding, being idiots and... that's pretty much it.

- Zeus and Hades

****Dear Ares,****

**Why do you think you are so cool if you got beaten by a twelve year old?**

**april-babe16**

april-baby16,

It was pure luck, okay? It's not my idea for the kid to have a lucky day. And he had his protective old daddy behind him who was reassuring me he'd somehow get me locked up in Tartarus for beating up his son - and I'm not going to Tartarus and missing out on a war just to beat up some idiot, momma's boy called Percy Jackson.

- Ares

****Dear Kronos,****

**Have you ever thought of growing a moustache? If not then you really should. It would make you look more evil.**

**april-babe16**

Never thought of it, never will. They're ridiculous.

- Kronos

**Dear Chiron,**

**Has a half blood sired by a god not from the Greek or Roman pantheon arrived at Camp Half-Blood? Cause think I might be a demigod but I don't feel Greek or Roman.**

- **Fenrir the Vicious**

Dear Fenrir the Vicious,

It has not happened yet, but other gods - alright, alright, Lord Zeus. Not a word. I cannot tell you any more but... Greek and Roman gods may not be the only gods out there.

- Chiron

**Ares,**

** I heard when you just godling you cried like a baby every time you lost a fight and when two giants shoved you in a jar. Olympians, can the rest of you confirm this?**

**- Fenrir the Vicious**

Dear Fenrir the Vicious,

Ares - IT'S NOT TRUE. THEY. LIE.

Apollo - Stop lying Ares. You cried like a baby. But I didn't, ha.

Hephaestus - True. And Apollo that was awful.

Artemis - Not true. Apollo, shut up.

Athena - False. They just hate Ares so they're saying it. I hate him but at least I'm not going to be childish an make things up.

Hermes - True!

Posiedon - I didn't really pay attention. Why pay attention to Ares when you can -

Demeter - Posiedon! Be quiet! And false.

Hera - False.

Aphrodite - WHAT? ARES! I DIDN'T KNOW THAT! I would have never gone out with you then...

Dionysus - Trueness.

Zeus - False. Urgh... why the do most of the rest of the Olympians have the maturity of 2 year olds...

- The Olympians

**To artemis: You're a horrible sexist witch! How dare you say that? How dare you use Orions name? If I remember correctly, YOUR THE ONE WHO SHOT HIM! You think you're all high and mighty? Well guess what? Your have to serve a male RULER!**

**- God1801**

Dear God1801,

Apollo _and _Artie here.

Okay, I (Apollo) am going to do the writing like a responsible older brother should do for his sister when she's having a hissy fit.

So, anyway, _I _was kind of the one to get Artie to shoot Orion cause I didn't really want her to... er... fall in love. Over-protective brother moment.

She's not high and mighty... that much... kind of... a bit... okay, she is, but still, as a brother I have to be nice to her, and as a mortal (Dude, I know you're not a god), you have to be even more careful - here's a hint: Don't call her a witch or she blasts you into pieces.

About the male ruler, she's saying... well, it's her dad so she isn't exactly going to go, "Hey Dad! I really really hate males so I'm gonna take the throne from you, okay?". Oh wait... that's what Kronos and Zeus kind of did... wow, Greeks are screwed up.

- Apollo (and Artie slightly)

**Dear Artie: **

**Is Apollo better? I mean he's funnier. NICER. Over all better person. Way cooler than you can be in a million years? Smarter than you (Giving up love, that's the dumbest thing you can do) I think you're just a crazy.**

**- God1801**

Dear God1801,

Wow, you like pissing off my younger sister, eh? I have to write. Again. So... yeah, I'm funnier, nicer and a better person than Artie - by the way, don't call her that. Only I call her that. ONLY. ME.

Anyway, Artie can be funny... in her sarcasm and dry humour. Or when she's pissed at me. The other gods find it hilarious apparently...

I have to admit though, maybe Artie's smarter than me... A BIT. But actually, it may or may not have been me to convince her to give up love... eh he he he...

And yes, Artie is a bit crazy. ;)

- Apollo

**Dear Lady Aphrodite, **

**What else are the signs of someone crushing on you? :) Thank you for answering my previous questions.**

**- Ali**

Dear Ali,

Don't worry dear, it's fine ;) Always fun to do. What are the signs of someone crushing on you? Easy. They'll probably want excuses just to hang around you all the time, as well as listen to every word you say, even if you don't say anything important - BUT remember all boys are different. Some might tease you, some might speak louder when you're around, some may have reasons to touch your hand, arm, etc, it's different for all boys - and girls. Just be on the look out for all signs. ;)

Love,

Aphrodite

**Dear Gaea: **

**I am a Son of Hades. While I love my father, I hate all the other gods (Mainly Artemis and Zeus (Bone head fool) and I wish to join your cause. Just tell me what to do, mistress, and it shall be done.**

**- God1801**

God1801,

Well, you see... even though you despise the other gods, you realize this is also to overthrow Hades? Of course it is, he was the first god I tried to overthrow - that ridiculous daughter of Pluto and son of Mars... but if you are still keen, than just kill the daughter of Pluto and son of Mars.

- Gaea

**Dear Artemis:**

** I feel the need to tell you I'm a guy. And I hate you. With a PASSION! And guess what? I'm not afraid of you! Hahahahhahahahaah! Witch. You are worthless useless sorry excuse for a goddess. Once Lady Geae rules, I will make you suffer!**

**- God1801**

God1801,

STOP. IT. You just got my iPhone destroyed... for the third time... thanks a lot. Yeah, Apollo here. Again. For the third. Time. Right now, I'm just going to write what Artie's telling me to write.

So she says, amazing mortal, you're a boy. Glad to know that you've figured out your gender. I've kind of realized you hate me with a passion. You're not afraid of me? Okay, then how about an angry me, Apollo, my Hunters, my dad and Athena? Are you scared of us all combined? If you aren't than you are a fool. By the way, have you read Harry Potter? If so, then you should know that I will take this as a compliment -insert ^^ from Apollo- For the rest of that... _yawn..._

Eh he... Artemis isn't in a good mood right now. At least she's calmed down. I'm going to celebrate with a hai - never mind. She's threatening to send me to Tartarus. Whoops.

- Apollo and (a pissed) Artemis

**What is your opinion of Katniss Everdeen? **

**Sincerely, **

**Greyeyedowl98**

Dear Greeyedowl98,

She's alright, I suppose. Excellent Hunter material... apart from the fact that she's in love... and she's about 2000 years into the future. Hm... I could alter things and make her despise men and not fall in love... interesting...

- Artemis

**Dear Athena, **

**I am trying to get a scholarship for a high school... Think you could influence the admissions board into letting me in? It would mean a lot to me ;)**

****Sincerely, ****

**Greyeyedowl98**

Dear Greyeyedowl98,

This is probably too late because of SOMEONE -insert uncomfortable shifts from author- but I don't think I could - well I could but SHOULD - influence the admissions board. To get in.. well, shouldn't you try your best to get in without help. It _does _test how smart you are where you can improve.

- Athena

**Dear Master Kronos, (I give you good titles, see?) **

**I'm merely curious, but what was Tartarus like? Was it torturous pain beyond painful? Was it a constant replay of your life? Was it just a state of nothingness? **

**-Soozin Hevincarrr **

**P.S. Your mother had to ask you to kill her husband, I think you had a better chance at taking over the world. **

**P.P.S. What should I do with all the gold dust I collected a while back? All the jar is doing is collecting dust. **

Yes, amazing titles...

Since it is quite hard to explain, why don't you go experience it instead of me explaining it?

- Kronos

P.S. ...thank you?

P.P.S. How do I know? Give it to me?

**Dear Atlas, **

**I'm sorry if I hurt your feelings. Do you reckon Kronos should be holding the sky instead? I want five GOOD reasons. **

**-Soozin Hevincarrr**

**P.S. You don't have any good titles... yet.**

1. He is an incompetent fool that hasn't yet gotten victory for the Titans

2. I am a better warrior.

3. The Titan Lord should get the harshest punishment, no?

4. He got defeated by a 16 year old boy which is worse than getting... tricked by a goddess.

5. He's just stupid. I mean, why didn't he just sneak onto Olympus, pretending to be a mortal he had taken over, lured the gods out of the throne room and destroyed the place? It'd be so much easier.

There.

- Atlas

**Dear Lady Athena (mom),**

**Did you help Sun Zu (Chinese army general and strategist) write the book the Art of War and the Book of Five Rings by Miyamoto Musashi (most famous samurai). Could you also send a few copies to our cabin to help us win capture the flag against Ares cabin? :P**

**- LordofWar**

Dear LordofWar,

Unfortunately, no, I did not help Sun Zu or Miyamoto Musashi, it was Mars - not Ares, Mars. Surprising, I know. Aren't there already some copies in the library? I'm surprised, I expected there to be. Double check, and if not you should get them by tomorrow.

- Athena

**Dear All the Gods:**

**OMGS I WILL KILL YOU KARINA! I am sosososo sorry. My cousin Karina seriously wants to be a Mary-Sue so she got on MY FREAKING IPOD while I was away and still was typing my messages. No, no, no, no, no! I DO have a father and I do NOT have the same eyes as Percy freaking Jackson's! I am so sorry for bothering you with that stupid question. And the traits-of-a-BLESSED-girl-by-Poseidon question was mine but for the last time I'm pretty sure I'm just a mortal!**

**Now excuse me as I go attack my cousin with a rusty fork that happens to be in front of me. **

**Girl of the Pool**

**- BTW I am not a demigod daughter of Poseidon. I just like the pool. Ok?**

Dear Girl of the Pool,

=.= I despise your cousin. She annoys me.

That was Posiedon, and now it is Athena here. You're cousin is quite... stupid? Sorry, that was an angry Posiedon. Er... so what am I supposed to write? Gods, why did _I _get shoved the pen and paper? Just because I'm the goddess of wisdom doesn't mean my intelligence has to make up for everyone else's (Olympians. No offence to you mortals) obvious lack of it.

- Athena (and a bit of Posiedon) on behalf of the Olympians... apparently.

**Dear Lord Hermes the Awesome:**

**I want to prank my cousin Karina. Attacking her with a rusty fork Ares-style is not working. I have a rusty fork, mango yogurt, an old cell phone, and duct tape. Help?**

**Thank you,**

**Girl of the Pool**

Dear Girl of the Pool,

Whoop, I'm awesome on another person's list. That's... 22058125968134643 since the world began. Ha. 1 more than Apollo.

Back on track, you probably had plenty of time on revenge because SOMEONE -insert another uncomfortable shift from author- has been lazy. Anyway... if you had those things again, I would also get some water. Then what you do is use duct tape and tie her to a chair - if possible - or something else. Dump the mango yogurt in her eyes and - does the old cell phone work? - if the phone works (would it matter if it breaks?), but the rusty fork on it and so it touches her leg or arm or whatever. Then, pour water on the cell phone. She shouldn't get THAT badly electrocuted... ;)

Warning: This may or may not kill her. Decide if you want to kill her before you do it. Or test it on an animal first... actually don't because Artemis will kill me for suggesting that. And so will the author.

- Hermes

**Dear Gaea,**

**Fine, I'll relent. I won't call you dirt-filled pothole. **

**Does it upset you that Poseidon ruled 75% of you? Also, does the blood seeping into the ground from battles affect you or do you like it? Last question: do you despise Demeter?**

**Dorky Porky**

Dorky Porky,

I don't really care. There's earth under water, no?

Blood doesn't effect me at all... sometimes it makes me stronger though - no I am not a vampire - especially not a sparkly one - I have read some mortals minds which is why I know this -inset shudder-.

And... I despise all gods, so yes.

- Gaea

**Dear Lady Hestia,**

**You're like my favorite goddess EVER. Don't get me g on that. But does it ever bother you that fire is used for completely sinister and evil reasons? It's used for battle, murder, torture, and a lot of other things that I don't need to go into. **

**Sincerely,**

**Tender of the Flames Jr.**

Dear Tender of the Flames Jr,

Why thank you - it's nice to know I'm appreciated. G? I think that might be a spelling error... if not, I have no idea what that means, sorry.

Yes, it can be used for completely sinister and evil reasons, but also remember, that it is the user that controls the fire - and then, only for a short amount of time. Fire is untameable. Anyone who thinks they can tame it is lying to themselves. Anyway, as I was saying before, it is the user's decision on how to use the fire. Fire can be a wonderful thing - it can be warmth, it can be hope, it can be light in the dark, it can be a spark for a new idea, it can be the beginning of evolution of mankind, it can be so many different wonderful things... but it all depends on how you use it. Use resources in a bad way and... most likely, it will come and bite you back.

- Hestia

**Dear Artemis:**

**Let's get to the point. **

**YOU ARE NOT EVIL! APOLLO MADE YOU SHOOT ORION! YOU HATE MEN BECAUSE THEY HAVE DONE UNSPEAKABLE EVILS TO US WOMEN! (to other reviewers:) GET A LIFE!**

**Sorry m'lady, for the rant. It just had to be done. **

**Hunter-Of-Artemis**

Dear Hunter-Of-Artemis,

I hope God1801 is reading this. Thank you.

- Artemis

**Dear Selene, Artemis, and Hecate: **

**I think the moon is more powerful than the sun. It's dark, it's cool, and it doesn't burn your skin off. If I had done my research correctly, you are the three faces of the moon, no? Artemis is the maiden girl, Selene is the full moon (the mother) and Hecate (no offense to you, milady) is the old crone (WTF?) Are you three best friends or something, and do you have the same interests?**

**SilverGirl**

Dear SilverGirl,

Hecate and Selene here - well Selene is writing (Artemis had to go do something or the other). Yes, your research is correct. I, Hecate, take no offence from the 'old crone' part, as it's just the way things are. No, we're not best friends - as you can tell by the Titan war (I was angry at the Olympians for no recognition!). _Anyway... _no, we don't have the same interests actually, Artemis prefers hunting over everything, Hecate her witchcraft (It's magic!) and I just do... anything.

- Selene and Hecate

**Dear Apollo:**

**I have the edge with instruments, but my singing is not so good. I can't reach the high octaves and my normal voice range isn't in the right key. The question is "am I your child" but don't your children cover the whole range of your powers?**

**Daisy**

Dear Daisy,

Not necessarily... but my kids are all good at archery. Best way to figure it out is through archery. If you're awesome at it, then most probably - music isn't always necessary - and if not... probably not.

- Apollo

**Dear Kronos:**

**(groan) What can I say? You. So. Suck. You got beaten by your freaking followers! And a 16-year old boy AND your 'wimpy' (not) son Poseidon. You are a terrible warrior. I tell you, if we removed your powers, you would be as wimpy as my cat Panda. I am on the god's side and will never join your cause. Bah. (*stops for a second, then adds:*) Humbug.**

**Annoyed**

**P.S. Stop the time on me, and I'll sic my surprise on you. You have been warned.**

Annoyed,

Bah... it was _one _time. The last time I almost won.

- Krios

P.S. If I stopped time on you, you wouldn't be able to tell. Imbecile.

**Dear The Gods, **

**Have you noticed you are short of minor gods, and they may well be hidden in the mortal world? For example: Steve Jobs (RIP) may be the god of Apple, Inc. Bill Gyes may be the god of Microsoft Windows. Both should be sons of Hermes. Tiger Woods may be the god of golf and the son of the god of sports. Whoever that is. King (koff koff) Henry VII may be the minor god of wealth or accounting. Get my point?**

**Curious**

Dear Curious,

Athena here. Again, I got shoved the pen and paper.

We are not short of minor gods. Have you got a list of how many there are? Here they are (and these aren't even all the deities:

_Eos - Goddess of dawn_

_Helios - (Other) god of the sun_

_Selene - (Other) goddess of the moon_

_Ariadne - goddess of passion and mazes_

_Aeolus - god of winds_

_Bia - Goddess of force_

_Cratos - God of strength and power_

_Deimos - Personification of terror_

_Eris - Goddess of discord_

_Eros - God of love_

_Psyche - Goddess of compassion_

_Geras - God of old age_

_Ganymede - Cupbearer of the Olympians_

_Harmonia - Goddess of harmony_

_Hebe - Goddess of youth_

_Hecate - Goddess of magic, witchcraft, necromancy and crossroads_

_Hypnos - God of sleep_

_Janus - God of doors, gates and new beginnings_

_Khione - Goddess of snow_

_Leto - Mother of Artemis and Apollo_

_Metis - Mother of Athena_

_Momus- God of blame_

_Moros - God of Doom_

_Nemisis - Goddess of consequences, revenge and balance_

_Nike - Goddess of victory_

_Persephone - Goddess of spring and flowers (and queen of the Underworld)_

_Phobos - God of Phobias and fear in general_

_Thanatos- (Other) God of death_

_The Erinyes - Otherwise known as The Furies. Goddesses of revenge._

_The Horae - Actually two groups of separate goddesses worshiped in different periods: the first three were goddesses of the seasons, the second generation were goddesses of law, justice and order._

_Tyche - Goddess of luck, destiny and fortune_

_Zelus - God of dedication._

_The Moirae: Klotho, Lachesis and Atropos - Controllers of life and destiny._

_The Muses - Representatives of the arts, sciences and music._

_The Oneiroi: Morpheus, Phobetor and Phantasos - Personifications of dreams and sons of Hypnos_

_Pan - God of the Wild_

_Iris - Goddess of the rainbow_

_Triton - God of ships_

We are _not _short of minor gods - this isn't all of them. There are more like Aether - god of light and the atmosphere; Antheia - goddess of gardens, flowers, swamps and marshes; Aristaeus - patron god of nimal husbandry, bee-keeping, and fruit trees; Ate - goddess of mischief and evil, Momus - god of satire, writers and poets, Plutus, god of wealth, etc, etc, etc.

God of Apple Inc. and Microsoft Windows? Really? Those are companies. We don't need a god of them, I assure you. We don't need a god of golf either. Or a god of accounting - for wealth, it's Plutus.

- Athena on behalf of all the Olympians

**Entries not allowed:**

**Non-stories: lists, bloopers, polls, previews, challenges, author notes, and etc.**

**Any form of interactive entry: choose your adventure, second person/you based, Q&As, and etc.**

**Love, (aka Please take down your story)**

Dear anonymous reviewer,

I would have preferred it if you had actually left a pen name, but it seems like you wouldn't like it if I PMed you about it... or in case you've done a story like that yourself. Next time, please do sign in for this. Anyway, maybe you should have waited till the end, because who ever said this was going to be completely questions and answers?

Love, Ayaashi

**Dear Hecate,**

**Did you found Hogwarts?**

**So just to clarify Harry Potter isn't your son?**

**-nissi1216**

Dear niss1216,

I... left a small spark of an idea, then left it to the four founders. For your second question... I'm not going over this again. The answer. Is. No.

- Hecate

**Dear Leo,**

***Happy dance/fangirl squeal***

**You can meet me in my dreams (:(:(:(:**

**Seriously though I love you!**

**Hazel can go to Hades, oh wait she's already been there...Well then Hazel can go to Alaska, oh wait she's been there too...Then she can go to Zurich I'm pretty sure she's never been there.**

**Are you Sammy because if you are I swear I will destroy Hazel to get to you? She is no match for my awesomeness. And she belongs with Frank.**

**I love you Leo!**

**-Mrs. Valdez (nissi1216)**

Dear nissi1216,

...er... you don't even know me. You've read a book on me... you still don't know me... who in Hades' name is Hazel? And who's Sammy? And Frank? And... you've decided to call yourself Mrs. Valdez?

I seriously need to get the price of a restraining order... too many fangirls come after me now days...

- Leo (I am not marrying you... yet... probably... I don't know!)

**Dear Poseidon, **

**Well, sorry for that question, hehehe... Guess I'm just curious. Hope Amphitrite didn't kill you, cause then, there will be one less awesome god XP**

**Anyway, since you're the God of the Sea, then I bet you go to the beach often right? Have you ever got sunburn then?**

**-JustAnotherRandomKid**

Dear JustAnotherRandomKid,

You got more annoying than Zeus then... no that's too much of an insult. And thank you.

Of course I go to the beach often - have you done any surfing before? If you want the best one in New York, try Rockaway Beach. The surf there's great! Anyway, back to the question, no actually, because I just tell Apollo to keep the heat low wherever I'm surfing (=))... and even if I did, I could just get rid of it in a second.

Ciao!

- Posiedon

**Dear Athena, **

**That might be a good way to study physic. I'll try it then. **

**Also, Do all your children have blonde hair and gray eyes? Or do you just imagine all of them like that?**

**-JustAnotherRandomKid**

Dear JustAnotherRandomKid,

Curiously, did it work?

Well, you see, the reason my children now have blonde hair and grey eyes is actually, because I despise the blonde jokes that fly around. My children are definitely exceptions to it, and I want to stop the ridiculous jokes. Hair colour does not effect you stupidity or wisdom. The grey eyes is so they still have something like their mother.

- Athena

**Dear Thalia and Nico,**

**What do you think about Thalico (ThaliaxNico)? **

**-JustAnotherRandomKid**

Dear JustAnotherRandomKid,

Thalia here _and Nico! _Yeah, whatever.

Anyway, I think it might _- just might - _have escaped people's notice that we are cousins _- meaning we are BLOOD RELATED_ - as well as the fact that I am a Hunter of Artemis - _and Thalia's about... well... much older than me. If she wasn't immortal or hadn't been a tree, she would currently be about... what, 23? 24?_ I don't know, but really, the whole thing is just disturbing. Really disturbing. Hey, Nico, want to know something more disturbing? _What? _You're writing is in italics, making it 'prettier' than mine._.. damn._ That's about right.

- Thalia _and Nico_

**To Kronos,**

**No you can't find me, cause I'm invincible and AWESOME (Not as awesome as Poseidon though. And Athena. And Hermes. And Apollo. And Hades. And Artemis. And... Bah, you know what I mean)! If you don't believe me, try it yourself! **

**BUAHAHAHAHAHA! **

**-JustAnotherRandomKid, who just went a little crazy XP**

**P.S: I stole some of your cookies. They're so good :P**

JustAnotherRandomKid,

...I'm not going to waste my time trying to find you while I could be planning on defeating the gods. Bah.

- Kronos

P.S. I do not have any cookies! And never did!

**Dear Gods and demigods,**

**What are all of your opinion on the Percy Jackson: The Lightning Thief movie?**

**ShadowTraveler08**

**P.S I find it horrible and lame. The book is so much better.**

Dear ShadowTraveler08,

Sup? It's Percy here. Anyway... I have decided to reply for everyone. Can I do a rant later? Damn, I'll have to wait for your reply before I can... I'm just going to sum it up then: The movie's rubbish. Never watch it. I mean, why do I not have black hair and green eyes? Why is Annabeth a freaking brunette? Why is Grover black? Why isn't Kronos mentioned? When the hell did I make a trident of water (though it is pretty cool)? When did Luke and I have this massive fight to get the Master Bolt (wish it had happened though...)? Why - okay, apparently I'm ranting now... never mind... just... it's rubbish.

- Percy

**Dear Apollo,**

**You're an awesome god (Apollo is an awesome god, he reigns...sorry, couldn't resist). **

**I plan on being a singer. I even write my own songs! My guitar teacher says I write songs better than some Nashville songwriters he knows. Did you bless me or something?**

**-darklilyofthevalley**

Dear darklilyofthevalley.

I know I'm awesome, thanks for the self-reassurance ;)

. Maaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaybe not. ;)

- Apollo

**Dear Aphrodite,**

**There's this girl I know who I think is your child. She's obsessed with boys, clothes, and every time I'm around her I feel self-consicous and have an overwhelming desire to actually spend more than an hour getting ready in the morning. Also, I think she can charmspeak. Do you think she's your child?**

**-darklilyofthevalley**

Dear darklilyofthevalley,

She might be... hm... we need more satyrs at schools... I don't want one of my babies getting in trouble with a monster on her own! =O That would be AWFUL! Need to contact the current Lord of the Wild...

- Aphrodite

**Dear Lord Kronos *kneels*,**

**I am a daughter of Hades. I have no love for my father and I wish to help you rise from Tartarus and destroy the gods. Just tell me what to do, sir, and I will do it.**

**-darklilyofthevalley**

...how many demigods are there that are children of Hades (usually) and hate their parent and the gods? Hades must have broken the oath a lot...

Er... I'll tell you later...

- Kronos

* * *

><p><strong>Yup. I am back... after way too long... I'm sorry... only reason - apart from moving - is laziness. Thank you to everyone who has stuck beside me while I've been stupidly lazy...<strong>

**So, I've split the answering into two parts, because I don't want to have to make you sit and read for too long and then make it boring, so if your questions have not yet been answered, don't worry, I'm onto it. So calm.**

**Anyway, I'm back, it's 1 week into the holidays and... yeah. Lots of exams coming up soon... =/ So... bye for now, and see you later (I think that's it.)**

**- Ayaashi**

**P.S. More name changes... but this is the name I'll stick to. Everyone go YAY. ^^**


	10. Important AN

**I'm sorry guys. I have to leave Fanfiction for certain reasons. I'm really sorry.**

**I didn't want you to stay there, waiting for another chapter to come and getting annoyed - well considering I haven't updated in forever for most of my stories (yes, I'm posting the same thing in all my stories), it doesn't really matter for some.**

**For the readers of stories I only started recently, I'm sorry about leaving them already.**

**For everyone, I hope you've enjoyed the stories I've put up. I'm not deleting them, but I'm just going to leave them there, so if you ever want a laugh for some of my stories, or to read some of my stories again, go ahead.**

**If you want to carry on and make your own ending, go ahead and do so! Just don't forget to put where the start of it was as well as - possibly - a link.**

**I may or may not come back guys. If I do... that's good, right?**

**~.Ayaashi.~**


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